PART IV.
A VOYAGE TO THE COUNTRY OF THE
HOUYHNHNMS.
CHAPTER I.
The author sets out as captain of a ship.
His men conspire against him, confine him a long time to his
cabin, and set him on shore in an unknown land. He travels
up into the country. The Yahoos, a strange sort of animal,
described. The author meets two Houyhnhnms.
I continued at home with my wife and children about five
months, in a very happy condition, if I could have learned the
lesson of knowing when I was well. I left my poor wife big
with child, and accepted an advantageous offer made me to be
captain of the Adventurer, a stout merchantman of 350 tons: for
I understood navigation well, and being grown weary of a
surgeon’s employment at sea, which, however, I could exercise
upon occasion, I took a skilful young man of that calling, one
Robert Purefoy, into my ship. We set sail from Portsmouth
upon the 7th day of September, 1710; on the 14th we met with
Captain Pocock, of Bristol, at Teneriffe, who was going to the
bay of Campechy to cut logwood. On the 16th, he was parted
from us by a storm; I heard since my return, that his ship
foundered, and none escaped but one cabin boy. He was an
honest man, and a good sailor, but a little too positive in his
own opinions, which was the cause of his destruction, as it has
been with several others; for if he had followed my advice, he
might have been safe at home with his family at this time, as
well as myself.
I had several men who died in my ship of calentures, so that
I was forced to get recruits out of Barbadoes and the Leeward
Islands, where I touched, by the direction of the merchants who
employed me; which I had soon too much cause to repent: for I
found afterwards, that most of them had been buccaneers. I
had fifty hands onboard; and my orders were, that I should trade
with the Indians in the South-Sea, and make what discoveries I
could. These rogues, whom I had picked up, debauched my
other men, and they all formed a conspiracy to seize the ship,
and secure me; which they did one morning, rushing into my
cabin, and binding me hand and foot, threatening to throw me
overboard, if I offered to stir. I told them, “I was their
prisoner, and would submit.” This they made me swear to
do, and then they unbound me, only fastening one of my legs with
a chain, near my bed, and placed a sentry at my door with his
piece charged, who was commanded to shoot me dead if I attempted
my liberty. They sent me own victuals and drink, and took
the government of the ship to themselves. Their design was
to turn pirates and, plunder the Spaniards, which they could not
do till they got more men. But first they resolved to sell
the goods the ship, and then go to Madagascar for recruits,
several among them having died since my confinement. They
sailed many weeks, and traded with the Indians; but I knew not
what course they took, being kept a close prisoner in my cabin,
and expecting nothing less than to be murdered, as they often
threatened me.
Upon the 9th day of May, 1711, one James Welch came down to
my cabin, and said, “he had orders from the captain to set me
ashore.” I expostulated with him, but in vain; neither
would he so much as tell me who their new captain was.
They forced me into the long-boat, letting me put on my best
suit of clothes, which were as good as new, and take a small
bundle of linen, but no arms, except my hanger; and they were so
civil as not to search my pockets, into which I conveyed what
money I had, with some other little necessaries. They
rowed about a league, and then set me down on a strand. I
desired them to tell me what country it was. They all
swore, “they knew no more than myself;” but said, “that the
captain” (as they called him) “was resolved, after they had sold
the lading, to get rid of me in the first place where they could
discover land.” They pushed off immediately, advising me
to make haste for fear of being overtaken by the tide, and so
bade me farewell.
In this desolate condition I advanced forward, and soon got
upon firm ground, where I sat down on a bank to rest myself, and
consider what I had best do. When I was a little
refreshed, I went up into the country, resolving to deliver
myself to the first savages I should meet, and purchase my life
from them by some bracelets, glass rings, and other toys, which
sailors usually provide themselves with in those voyages, and
whereof I had some about me. The land was divided by long
rows of trees, not regularly planted, but naturally growing;
there was great plenty of grass, and several fields of oats.
I walked very circumspectly, for fear of being surprised, or
suddenly shot with an arrow from behind, or on either side.
I fell into a beaten road, where I saw many tracts of human
feet, and some of cows, but most of horses. At last I
beheld several animals in a field, and one or two of the same
kind sitting in trees. Their shape was very singular and
deformed, which a little discomposed me, so that I lay down
behind a thicket to observe them better. Some of them
coming forward near the place where I lay, gave me an
opportunity of distinctly marking their form. Their heads
and breasts were covered with a thick hair, some frizzled, and
others lank; they had beards like goats, and a long ridge of
hair down their backs, and the fore parts of their legs and
feet; but the rest of their bodies was bare, so that I might see
their skins, which were of a brown buff colour. They had
no tails, nor any hair at all on their buttocks, except about
the anus, which, I presume, nature had placed there to defend
them as they sat on the ground, for this posture they used, as
well as lying down, and often stood on their hind feet.
They climbed high trees as nimbly as a squirrel, for they had
strong extended claws before and behind, terminating in sharp
points, and hooked. They would often spring, and bound,
and leap, with prodigious agility. The females were not so
large as the males; they had long lank hair on their heads, but
none on their faces, nor any thing more than a sort of down on
the rest of their bodies, except about the anus and pudenda.
The dugs hung between their fore feet, and often reached almost
to the ground as they walked. The hair of both sexes was
of several colours, brown, red, black, and yellow. Upon
the whole, I never beheld, in all my travels, so disagreeable an
animal, or one against which I naturally conceived so strong an
antipathy. So that, thinking I had seen enough, full of
contempt and aversion, I got up, and pursued the beaten road,
hoping it might direct me to the cabin of some Indian. I
had not got far, when I met one of these creatures full in my
way, and coming up directly to me. The ugly monster, when
he saw me, distorted several ways, every feature of his visage,
and stared, as at an object he had never seen before; then
approaching nearer, lifted up his fore-paw, whether out of
curiosity or mischief I could not tell; but I drew my hanger,
and gave him a good blow with the flat side of it, for I durst
not strike with the edge, fearing the inhabitants might be
provoked against me, if they should come to know that I had
killed or maimed any of their cattle. When the beast felt
the smart, he drew back, and roared so loud, that a herd of at
least forty came flocking about me from the next field, howling
and making odious faces; but I ran to the body of a tree, and
leaning my back against it, kept them off by waving my hanger.
Several of this cursed brood, getting hold of the branches
behind, leaped up into the tree, whence they began to discharge
their excrements on my head; however, I escaped pretty well by
sticking close to the stem of the tree, but was almost stifled
with the filth, which fell about me on every side.
In the midst of this distress, I observed them all to run
away on a sudden as fast as they could; at which I ventured to
leave the tree and pursue the road, wondering what it was that
could put them into this fright. But looking on my left
hand, I saw a horse walking softly in the field; which my
persecutors having sooner discovered, was the cause of their
flight. The horse started a little, when he came near me,
but soon recovering himself, looked full in my face with
manifest tokens of wonder; he viewed my hands and feet, walking
round me several times. I would have pursued my journey,
but he placed himself directly in the way, yet looking with a
very mild aspect, never offering the least violence. We
stood gazing at each other for some time; at last I took the
boldness to reach my hand towards his neck with a design to
stroke it, using the common style and whistle of jockeys, when
they are going to handle a strange horse. But this animal
seemed to receive my civilities with disdain, shook his head,
and bent his brows, softly raising up his right fore-foot to
remove my hand. Then he neighed three or four times, but
in so different a cadence, that I almost began to think he was
speaking to himself, in some language of his own.
While he and I were thus employed, another horse came up; who
applying himself to the first in a very formal manner, they
gently struck each other’s right hoof before, neighing several
times by turns, and varying the sound, which seemed to be almost
articulate. They went some paces off, as if it were to
confer together, walking side by side, backward and forward,
like persons deliberating upon some affair of weight, but often
turning their eyes towards me, as it were to watch that I might
not escape. I was amazed to see such actions and behaviour
in brute beasts; and concluded with myself, that if the
inhabitants of this country were endued with a proportionable
degree of reason, they must needs be the wisest people upon
earth. This thought gave me so much comfort, that I
resolved to go forward, until I could discover some house or
village, or meet with any of the natives, leaving the two horses
to discourse together as they pleased. But the first, who
was a dapple gray, observing me to steal off, neighed after me
in so expressive a tone, that I fancied myself to understand
what he meant; whereupon I turned back, and came near to him to
expect his farther commands: but concealing my fear as much as I
could, for I began to be in some pain how this adventure might
terminate; and the reader will easily believe I did not much
like my present situation.
The two horses came up close to me, looking with great
earnestness upon my face and hands. The gray steed rubbed
my hat all round with his right fore-hoof, and discomposed it so
much that I was forced to adjust it better by taking it off and
settling it again; whereat, both he and his companion (who was a
brown bay) appeared to be much surprised: the latter felt the
lappet of my coat, and finding it to hang loose about me, they
both looked with new signs of wonder. He stroked my right
hand, seeming to admire the softness and colour; but he squeezed
it so hard between his hoof and his pastern, that I was forced
to roar; after which they both touched me with all possible
tenderness. They were under great perplexity about my
shoes and stockings, which they felt very often, neighing to
each other, and using various gestures, not unlike those of a
philosopher, when he would attempt to solve some new and
difficult phenomenon.
Upon the whole, the behaviour of these animals was so orderly
and rational, so acute and judicious, that I at last concluded
they must needs be magicians, who had thus metamorphosed
themselves upon some design, and seeing a stranger in the way,
resolved to divert themselves with him; or, perhaps, were really
amazed at the sight of a man so very different in habit,
feature, and complexion, from those who might probably live in
so remote a climate. Upon the strength of this reasoning,
I ventured to address them in the following manner: “Gentlemen,
if you be conjurers, as I have good cause to believe, you can
understand my language; therefore I make bold to let your
worships know that I am a poor distressed Englishman, driven by
his misfortunes upon your coast; and I entreat one of you to let
me ride upon his back, as if he were a real horse, to some house
or village where I can be relieved. In return of which
favour, I will make you a present of this knife and bracelet,”
taking them out of my pocket. The two creatures stood
silent while I spoke, seeming to listen with great attention,
and when I had ended, they neighed frequently towards each
other, as if they were engaged in serious conversation. I
plainly observed that their language expressed the passions very
well, and the words might, with little pains, be resolved into
an alphabet more easily than the Chinese.
I could frequently distinguish the word Yahoo, which
was repeated by each of them several times: and although it was
impossible for me to conjecture what it meant, yet while the two
horses were busy in conversation, I endeavoured to practise this
word upon my tongue; and as soon as they were silent, I boldly
pronounced Yahoo in a loud voice, imitating at the same
time, as near as I could, the neighing of a horse; at which they
were both visibly surprised; and the gray repeated the same word
twice, as if he meant to teach me the right accent; wherein I
spoke after him as well as I could, and found myself perceivably
to improve every time, though very far from any degree of
perfection. Then the bay tried me with a second word, much
harder to be pronounced; but reducing it to the English
orthography, may be spelt thus, Houyhnhnm. I did
not succeed in this so well as in the former; but after two or
three farther trials, I had better fortune; and they both
appeared amazed at my capacity.
After some further discourse, which I then conjectured might
relate to me, the two friends took their leaves, with the same
compliment of striking each other’s hoof; and the gray made me
signs that I should walk before him; wherein I thought it
prudent to comply, till I could find a better director.
When I offered to slacken my pace, he would cry hhuun hhuun:
I guessed his meaning, and gave him to understand, as well as I
could, “that I was weary, and not able to walk faster;” upon
which he would stand awhile to let me rest.
CHAPTER II.
The author conducted by a Houyhnhnm to his
house. The house described. The author’s reception.
The food of the Houyhnhnms. The author in distress for
want of meat. Is at last relieved. His manner of
feeding in this country.
Having travelled about three miles, we came to a long kind of
building, made of timber stuck in the ground, and wattled
across; the roof was low and covered with straw. I now
began to be a little comforted; and took out some toys, which
travellers usually carry for presents to the savage Indians of
America, and other parts, in hopes the people of the house would
be thereby encouraged to receive me kindly. The horse made
me a sign to go in first; it was a large room with a smooth clay
floor, and a rack and manger, extending the whole length on one
side. There were three nags and two mares, not eating, but
some of them sitting down upon their hams, which I very much
wondered at; but wondered more to see the rest employed in
domestic business; these seemed but ordinary cattle.
However, this confirmed my first opinion, that a people who
could so far civilise brute animals, must needs excel in wisdom
all the nations of the world. The gray came in just after,
and thereby prevented any ill treatment which the others might
have given me. He neighed to them several times in a style
of authority, and received answers.
Beyond this room there were three others, reaching the length
of the house, to which you passed through three doors, opposite
to each other, in the manner of a vista. We went through
the second room towards the third. Here the gray walked in
first, beckoning me to attend: I waited in the second room, and
got ready my presents for the master and mistress of the house;
they were two knives, three bracelets of false pearls, a small
looking-glass, and a bead necklace. The horse neighed
three or four times, and I waited to hear some answers in a
human voice, but I heard no other returns than in the same
dialect, only one or two a little shriller than his. I
began to think that this house must belong to some person of
great note among them, because there appeared so much ceremony
before I could gain admittance. But, that a man of quality
should be served all by horses, was beyond my comprehension.
I feared my brain was disturbed by my sufferings and
misfortunes. I roused myself, and looked about me in the
room where I was left alone: this was furnished like the first,
only after a more elegant manner. I rubbed my eyes often,
but the same objects still occurred. I pinched my arms and
sides to awake myself, hoping I might be in a dream. I
then absolutely concluded, that all these appearances could be
nothing else but necromancy and magic. But I had no time
to pursue these reflections; for the gray horse came to the
door, and made me a sign to follow him into the third room where
I saw a very comely mare, together with a colt and foal, sitting
on their haunches upon mats of straw, not unartfully made, and
perfectly neat and clean.
The mare soon after my entrance rose from her mat, and coming
up close, after having nicely observed my hands and face, gave
me a most contemptuous look; and turning to the horse, I heard
the word Yahoo often repeated betwixt them; the meaning
of which word I could not then comprehend, although it was the
first I had learned to pronounce. But I was soon better
informed, to my everlasting mortification; for the horse,
beckoning to me with his head, and repeating the hhuun,
hhuun, as he did upon the road, which I understood was to
attend him, led me out into a kind of court, where was another
building, at some distance from the house. Here we
entered, and I saw three of those detestable creatures, which I
first met after my landing, feeding upon roots, and the flesh of
some animals, which I afterwards found to be that of asses and
dogs, and now and then a cow, dead by accident or disease.
They were all tied by the neck with strong withes fastened to a
beam; they held their food between the claws of their fore feet,
and tore it with their teeth.
The master horse ordered a sorrel nag, one of his servants,
to untie the largest of these animals, and take him into the
yard. The beast and I were brought close together, and by
our countenances diligently compared both by master and servant,
who thereupon repeated several times the word Yahoo.
My horror and astonishment are not to be described, when I
observed in this abominable animal, a perfect human figure: the
face of it indeed was flat and broad, the nose depressed, the
lips large, and the mouth wide; but these differences are common
to all savage nations, where the lineaments of the countenance
are distorted, by the natives suffering their infants to lie
grovelling on the earth, or by carrying them on their backs,
nuzzling with their face against the mothers’ shoulders.
The fore-feet of the Yahoo differed from my hands in
nothing else but the length of the nails, the coarseness and
brownness of the palms, and the hairiness on the backs.
There was the same resemblance between our feet, with the same
differences; which I knew very well, though the horses did not,
because of my shoes and stockings; the same in every part of our
bodies except as to hairiness and colour, which I have already
described.
The great difficulty that seemed to stick with the two
horses, was to see the rest of my body so very different from
that of a Yahoo, for which I was obliged to my clothes,
whereof they had no conception. The sorrel nag offered me
a root, which he held (after their manner, as we shall describe
in its proper place) between his hoof and pastern; I took it in
my hand, and, having smelt it, returned it to him again as
civilly as I could. He brought out of the Yahoos’
kennel a piece of ass’s flesh; but it smelt so offensively that
I turned from it with loathing: he then threw it to the Yahoo,
by whom it was greedily devoured. He afterwards showed me
a wisp of hay, and a fetlock full of oats; but I shook my head,
to signify that neither of these were food for me. And
indeed I now apprehended that I must absolutely starve, if I did
not get to some of my own species; for as to those filthy
Yahoos, although there were few greater lovers of mankind at
that time than myself, yet I confess I never saw any sensitive
being so detestable on all accounts; and the more I came near
them the more hateful they grew, while I stayed in that country.
This the master horse observed by my behaviour, and therefore
sent the Yahoo back to his kennel. He then put his
fore-hoof to his mouth, at which I was much surprised, although
he did it with ease, and with a motion that appeared perfectly
natural, and made other signs, to know what I would eat; but I
could not return him such an answer as he was able to apprehend;
and if he had understood me, I did not see how it was possible
to contrive any way for finding myself nourishment. While
we were thus engaged, I observed a cow passing by, whereupon I
pointed to her, and expressed a desire to go and milk her.
This had its effect; for he led me back into the house, and
ordered a mare-servant to open a room, where a good store of
milk lay in earthen and wooden vessels, after a very orderly and
cleanly manner. She gave me a large bowlful, of which I
drank very heartily, and found myself well refreshed.
About noon, I saw coming towards the house a kind of vehicle
drawn like a sledge by four Yahoos. There was in it
an old steed, who seemed to be of quality; he alighted with his
hind-feet forward, having by accident got a hurt in his left
fore-foot. He came to dine with our horse, who received
him with great civility. They dined in the best room, and
had oats boiled in milk for the second course, which the old
horse ate warm, but the rest cold. Their mangers were
placed circular in the middle of the room, and divided into
several partitions, round which they sat on their haunches, upon
bosses of straw. In the middle was a large rack, with
angles answering to every partition of the manger; so that each
horse and mare ate their own hay, and their own mash of oats and
milk, with much decency and regularity. The behaviour of
the young colt and foal appeared very modest, and that of the
master and mistress extremely cheerful and complaisant to their
guest. The gray ordered me to stand by him; and much
discourse passed between him and his friend concerning me, as I
found by the stranger’s often looking on me, and the frequent
repetition of the word
Yahoo.
I happened to wear my gloves, which the master gray
observing, seemed perplexed, discovering signs of wonder what I
had done to my fore-feet. He put his hoof three or four
times to them, as if he would signify, that I should reduce them
to their former shape, which I presently did, pulling off both
my gloves, and putting them into my pocket. This
occasioned farther talk; and I saw the company was pleased with
my behaviour, whereof I soon found the good effects. I was
ordered to speak the few words I understood; and while they were
at dinner, the master taught me the names for oats, milk, fire,
water, and some others, which I could readily pronounce after
him, having from my youth a great facility in learning
languages.
When dinner was done, the master horse took me aside, and by
signs and words made me understand the concern he was in that I
had nothing to eat. Oats in their tongue are called
hlunnh. This word I pronounced two or three times; for
although I had refused them at first, yet, upon second thoughts,
I considered that I could contrive to make of them a kind of
bread, which might be sufficient, with milk, to keep me alive,
till I could make my escape to some other country, and to
creatures of my own species. The horse immediately ordered
a white mare servant of his family to bring me a good quantity
of oats in a sort of wooden tray. These I heated before
the fire, as well as I could, and rubbed them till the husks
came off, which I made a shift to winnow from the grain. I
ground and beat them between two stones; then took water, and
made them into a paste or cake, which I toasted at the fire and
eat warm with milk. It was at first a very insipid diet,
though common enough in many parts of Europe, but grew tolerable
by time; and having been often reduced to hard fare in my life,
this was not the first experiment I had made how easily nature
is satisfied. And I cannot but observe, that I never had
one hours sickness while I stayed in this island. It is
true, I sometimes made a shift to catch a rabbit, or bird, by
springs made of Yahoo’s
hairs; and I often gathered wholesome herbs, which I boiled, and
ate as salads with my bread; and now and then, for a rarity, I
made a little butter, and drank the whey. I was at first
at a great loss for salt, but custom soon reconciled me to the
want of it; and I am confident that the frequent use of salt
among us is an effect of luxury, and was first introduced only
as a provocative to drink, except where it is necessary for
preserving flesh in long voyages, or in places remote from great
markets; for we observe no animal to be fond of it but man, and
as to myself, when I left this country, it was a great while
before I could endure the taste of it in anything that I ate.
This is enough to say upon the subject of my diet, wherewith
other travellers fill their books, as if the readers were
personally concerned whether we fare well or ill. However,
it was necessary to mention this matter, lest the world should
think it impossible that I could find sustenance for three years
in such a country, and among such inhabitants.
When it grew towards evening, the master horse ordered a
place for me to lodge in; it was but six yards from the house
and separated from the stable of the Yahoos. Here I
got some straw, and covering myself with my own clothes, slept
very sound. But I was in a short time better accommodated,
as the reader shall know hereafter, when I come to treat more
particularly about my way of living.
CHAPTER III.
The author studies to learn the language.
The Houyhnhnm, his master, assists in teaching him. The
language described. Several Houyhnhnms of quality come out
of curiosity to see the author. He gives his master a
short account of his voyage.
My principal endeavour was to learn the language, which my
master (for so I shall henceforth call him), and his children,
and every servant of his house, were desirous to teach me; for
they looked upon it as a prodigy, that a brute animal should
discover such marks of a rational creature. I pointed to
every thing, and inquired the name of it, which I wrote down in
my journal-book when I was alone, and corrected my bad accent by
desiring those of the family to pronounce it often. In
this employment, a sorrel nag, one of the under-servants, was
very ready to assist me.
In speaking, they pronounced through the nose and throat, and
their language approaches nearest to the High-Dutch, or German,
of any I know in Europe; but is much more graceful and
significant. The emperor Charles V. made almost the same
observation, when he said “that if he were to speak to his
horse, it should be in High-Dutch.”
The curiosity and impatience of my master were so great, that
he spent many hours of his leisure to instruct me. He was
convinced (as he afterwards told me) that I must be a Yahoo;
but my teachableness, civility, and cleanliness, astonished him;
which were qualities altogether opposite to those animals.
He was most perplexed about my clothes, reasoning sometimes with
himself, whether they were a part of my body: for I never pulled
them off till the family were asleep, and got them on before
they waked in the morning. My master was eager to learn
“whence I came; how I acquired those appearances of reason,
which I discovered in all my actions; and to know my story from
my own mouth, which he hoped he should soon do by the great
proficiency I made in learning and pronouncing their words and
sentences.” To help my memory, I formed all I learned into
the English alphabet, and writ the words down, with the
translations. This last, after some time, I ventured to do
in my master’s presence. It cost me much trouble to
explain to him what I was doing; for the inhabitants have not
the least idea of books or literature.
In about ten weeks time, I was able to understand most of his
questions; and in three months, could give him some tolerable
answers. He was extremely curious to know “from what part
of the country I came, and how I was taught to imitate a
rational creature; because the Yahoos (whom he saw I
exactly resembled in my head, hands, and face, that were only
visible), with some appearance of cunning, and the strongest
disposition to mischief, were observed to be the most
unteachable of all brutes.” I answered, “that I came over
the sea, from a far place, with many others of my own kind, in a
great hollow vessel made of the bodies of trees: that my
companions forced me to land on this coast, and then left me to
shift for myself.” It was with some difficulty, and by the
help of many signs, that I brought him to understand me.
He replied, “that I must needs be mistaken, or that I said the
thing which was not;” for they have no word in their language to
express lying or falsehood. “He knew it was impossible
that there could be a country beyond the sea, or that a parcel
of brutes could move a wooden vessel whither they pleased upon
water. He was sure no Houyhnhnm
alive could make such a vessel, nor would trust Yahoos to
manage it.”
The word Houyhnhnm, in their tongue, signifies a
horse, and, in its etymology, the perfection of nature.
I told my master, “that I was at a loss for expression, but
would improve as fast as I could; and hoped, in a short time, I
should be able to tell him wonders.” He was pleased to
direct his own mare, his colt, and foal, and the servants of the
family, to take all opportunities of instructing me; and every
day, for two or three hours, he was at the same pains himself.
Several horses and mares of quality in the neighbourhood came
often to our house, upon the report spread of “a wonderful
Yahoo, that could speak like a Houyhnhnm, and seemed,
in his words and actions, to discover some glimmerings of
reason.” These delighted to converse with me: they put
many questions, and received such answers as I was able to
return. By all these advantages I made so great a
progress, that, in five months from my arrival I understood
whatever was spoken, and could express myself tolerably well.
The Houyhnhnms, who came to visit my master out of a
design of seeing and talking with me, could hardly believe me to
be a right Yahoo, because my body had a different
covering from others of my kind. They were astonished to
observe me without the usual hair or skin, except on my head,
face, and hands; but I discovered that secret to my master upon
an accident which happened about a fortnight before.
I have already told the reader, that every night, when the
family were gone to bed, it was my custom to strip, and cover
myself with my clothes. It happened, one morning early,
that my master sent for me by the sorrel nag, who was his valet.
When he came I was fast asleep, my clothes fallen off on one
side, and my shirt above my waist. I awaked at the noise
he made, and observed him to deliver his message in some
disorder; after which he went to my master, and in a great
fright gave him a very confused account of what he had seen.
This I presently discovered, for, going as soon as I was dressed
to pay my attendance upon his honour, he asked me “the meaning
of what his servant had reported, that I was not the same thing
when I slept, as I appeared to be at other times; that his vale
assured him, some part of me was white, some yellow, at least
not so white, and some brown.”
I had hitherto concealed the secret of my dress, in order to
distinguish myself, as much as possible, from that cursed race
of Yahoos; but now I found it in vain to do so any
longer. Besides, I considered that my clothes and shoes
would soon wear out, which already were in a declining
condition, and must be supplied by some contrivance from the
hides of Yahoos, or other brutes; whereby the whole
secret would be known. I therefore told my master, “that
in the country whence I came, those of my kind always covered
their bodies with the hairs of certain animals prepared by art,
as well for decency as to avoid the inclemencies of air, both
hot and cold; of which, as to my own person, I would give him
immediate conviction, if he pleased to command me: only desiring
his excuse, if I did not expose those parts that nature taught
us to conceal.” He said, “my discourse was all very
strange, but especially the last part; for he could not
understand, why nature should teach us to conceal what nature
had given; that neither himself nor family were ashamed of any
parts of their bodies; but, however, I might do as I pleased.”
Whereupon I first unbuttoned my coat, and pulled it off. I
did the same with my waistcoat. I drew off my shoes,
stockings, and breeches. I let my shirt down to my waist,
and drew up the bottom; fastening it like a girdle about my
middle, to hide my nakedness.
My master observed the whole performance with great signs of
curiosity and admiration. He took up all my clothes in his
pastern, one piece after another, and examined them diligently;
he then stroked my body very gently, and looked round me several
times; after which, he said, it was plain I must be a perfect
Yahoo; but that I differed very much from the rest of my
species in the softness, whiteness, and smoothness of my skin;
my want of hair in several parts of my body; the shape and
shortness of my claws behind and before; and my affectation of
walking continually on my two hinder feet. He desired to
see no more; and gave me leave to put on my clothes again, for I
was shuddering with cold.
I expressed my uneasiness at his giving me so often the
appellation of Yahoo, an odious animal, for which I had
so utter a hatred and contempt: I begged he would forbear
applying that word to me, and make the same order in his family
and among his friends whom he suffered to see me. I
requested likewise, “that the secret of my having a false
covering to my body, might be known to none but himself, at
least as long as my present clothing should last; for as to what
the sorrel nag, his valet, had observed, his honour might
command him to conceal it.”
All this my master very graciously consented to; and thus the
secret was kept till my clothes began to wear out, which I was
forced to supply by several contrivances that shall hereafter be
mentioned. In the meantime, he desired “I would go on with
my utmost diligence to learn their language, because he was more
astonished at my capacity for speech and reason, than at the
figure of my body, whether it were covered or not;” adding,
“that he waited with some impatience to hear the wonders which I
promised to tell him.”
Thenceforward he doubled the pains he had been at to instruct
me: he brought me into all company, and made them treat me with
civility; “because,” as he told them, privately, “this would put
me into good humour, and make me more diverting.”
Every day, when I waited on him, beside the trouble he was at
in teaching, he would ask me several questions concerning
myself, which I answered as well as I could, and by these means
he had already received some general ideas, though very
imperfect. It would be tedious to relate the several steps
by which I advanced to a more regular conversation; but the
first account I gave of myself in any order and length was to
this purpose:
“That I came from a very far country, as I already had
attempted to tell him, with about fifty more of my own species;
that we travelled upon the seas in a great hollow vessel made of
wood, and larger than his honour’s house. I described the
ship to him in the best terms I could, and explained, by the
help of my handkerchief displayed, how it was driven forward by
the wind. That upon a quarrel among us, I was set on shore
on this coast, where I walked forward, without knowing whither,
till he delivered me from the persecution of those execrable
Yahoos.” He asked me, “who made the ship, and how it
was possible that the Houyhnhnms of my country would
leave it to the management of brutes?” My answer was,
“that I durst proceed no further in my relation, unless he would
give me his word and honour that he would not be offended, and
then I would tell him the wonders I had so often promised.”
He agreed; and I went on by assuring him, that the ship was made
by creatures like myself; who, in all the countries I had
travelled, as well as in my own, were the only governing
rational animals; and that upon my arrival hither, I was as much
astonished to see the
Houyhnhnms act like rational beings, as he, or his friends,
could be, in finding some marks of reason in a creature he was
pleased to call a Yahoo; to which I owned my resemblance
in every part, but could not account for their degenerate and
brutal nature. I said farther, “that if good fortune ever
restored me to my native country, to relate my travels hither,
as I resolved to do, everybody would believe, that I said the
thing that was not, that I invented the story out of my own
head; and (with all possible respect to himself, his family, and
friends, and under his promise of not being offended) our
countrymen would hardly think it probable that a Houyhnhnm
should be the presiding creature of a nation, and a Yahoo
the brute.”
CHAPTER IV.
The Houyhnhnm’s notion of truth and
falsehood. The author’s discourse disapproved by his
master. The author gives a more particular account of
himself, and the accidents of his voyage.
My master heard me with great appearances of uneasiness in
his countenance; because doubting, or not believing, are so
little known in this country, that the inhabitants cannot tell
how to behave themselves under such circumstances. And I
remember, in frequent discourses with my master concerning the
nature of manhood in other parts of the world, having occasion
to talk of lying and false representation, it was with much
difficulty that he comprehended what I meant, although he had
otherwise a most acute judgment. For he argued thus: “that
the use of speech was to make us understand one another, and to
receive information of facts; now, if any one said the thing
which was not, these ends were defeated, because I cannot
properly be said to understand him; and I am so far from
receiving information, that he leaves me worse than in
ignorance; for I am led to believe a thing black, when it is
white, and short, when it is long.” And these were all the
notions he had concerning that faculty of lying, so perfectly
well understood, and so universally practised, among human
creatures.
To return from this digression. When I asserted that
the
Yahoos were the only governing animals in my country, which
my master said was altogether past his conception, he desired to
know, “whether we had Houyhnhnms among us, and what was
their employment?” I told him, “we had great numbers; that
in summer they grazed in the fields, and in winter were kept in
houses with hay and oats, where Yahoo servants were
employed to rub their skins smooth, comb their manes, pick their
feet, serve them with food, and make their beds.” “I
understand you well,” said my master: “it is now very plain,
from all you have spoken, that whatever share of reason the
Yahoos
pretend to, the Houyhnhnms are your masters; I heartily
wish our Yahoos would be so tractable.” I begged
“his honour would please to excuse me from proceeding any
further, because I was very certain that the account he expected
from me would be highly displeasing.” But he insisted in
commanding me to let him know the best and the worst. I
told him “he should be obeyed.” I owned “that the
Houyhnhnms among us, whom we called horses, were the most
generous and comely animals we had; that they excelled in
strength and swiftness; and when they belonged to persons of
quality, were employed in travelling, racing, or drawing
chariots; they were treated with much kindness and care, till
they fell into diseases, or became foundered in the feet; but
then they were sold, and used to all kind of drudgery till they
died; after which their skins were stripped, and sold for what
they were worth, and their bodies left to be devoured by dogs
and birds of prey. But the common race of horses had not
so good fortune, being kept by farmers and carriers, and other
mean people, who put them to greater labour, and fed them
worse.” I described, as well as I could, our way of
riding; the shape and use of a bridle, a saddle, a spur, and a
whip; of harness and wheels. I added, “that we fastened
plates of a certain hard substance, called iron, at the bottom
of their feet, to preserve their hoofs from being broken by the
stony ways, on which we often travelled.”
My master, after some expressions of great indignation,
wondered “how we dared to venture upon a Houyhnhnm’s
back; for he was sure, that the weakest servant in his house
would be able to shake off the strongest Yahoo; or by
lying down and rolling on his back, squeeze the brute to death.”
I answered “that our horses were trained up, from three or four
years old, to the several uses we intended them for; that if any
of them proved intolerably vicious, they were employed for
carriages; that they were severely beaten, while they were
young, for any mischievous tricks; that the males, designed for
the common use of riding or draught, were generally castrated
about two years after their birth, to take down their spirits,
and make them more tame and gentle; that they were indeed
sensible of rewards and punishments; but his honour would please
to consider, that they had not the least tincture of reason, any
more than the Yahoos in this country.”
It put me to the pains of many circumlocutions, to give my
master a right idea of what I spoke; for their language does not
abound in variety of words, because their wants and passions are
fewer than among us. But it is impossible to express his
noble resentment at our savage treatment of the Houyhnhnm
race; particularly after I had explained the manner and use of
castrating horses among us, to hinder them from propagating
their kind, and to render them more servile. He said, “if
it were possible there could be any country where Yahoos
alone were endued with reason, they certainly must be the
governing animal; because reason in time will always prevail
against brutal strength. But, considering the frame of our
bodies, and especially of mine, he thought no creature of equal
bulk was so ill-contrived for employing that reason in the
common offices of life;” whereupon he desired to know “whether
those among whom I lived resembled me, or the Yahoos of
his country?” I assured him, “that I was as well shaped as
most of my age; but the younger, and the females, were much more
soft and tender, and the skins of the latter generally as white
as milk.” He said, “I differed indeed from other Yahoos,
being much more cleanly, and not altogether so deformed; but, in
point of real advantage, he thought I differed for the worse:
that my nails were of no use either to my fore or hinder feet;
as to my fore feet, he could not properly call them by that
name, for he never observed me to walk upon them; that they were
too soft to bear the ground; that I generally went with them
uncovered; neither was the covering I sometimes wore on them of
the same shape, or so strong as that on my feet behind: that I
could not walk with any security, for if either of my hinder
feet slipped, I must inevitably fail.” He then began to
find fault with other parts of my body: “the flatness of my
face, the prominence of my nose, mine eyes placed directly in
front, so that I could not look on either side without turning
my head: that I was not able to feed myself, without lifting one
of my fore-feet to my mouth: and therefore nature had placed
those joints to answer that necessity. He knew not what
could be the use of those several clefts and divisions in my
feet behind; that these were too soft to bear the hardness and
sharpness of stones, without a covering made from the skin of
some other brute; that my whole body wanted a fence against heat
and cold, which I was forced to put on and off every day, with
tediousness and trouble: and lastly, that he observed every
animal in this country naturally to abhor the Yahoos,
whom the weaker avoided, and the stronger drove from them.
So that, supposing us to have the gift of reason, he could not
see how it were possible to cure that natural antipathy, which
every creature discovered against us; nor consequently how we
could tame and render them serviceable. However, he
would,” as he said, “debate the matter no farther, because he
was more desirous to know my own story, the country where I was
born, and the several actions and events of my life, before I
came hither.”
I assured him, “how extremely desirous I was that he should
be satisfied on every point; but I doubted much, whether it
would be possible for me to explain myself on several subjects,
whereof his honour could have no conception; because I saw
nothing in his country to which I could resemble them; that,
however, I would do my best, and strive to express myself by
similitudes, humbly desiring his assistance when I wanted proper
words;” which he was pleased to promise me.
I said, “my birth was of honest parents, in an island called
England; which was remote from his country, as many days’
journey as the strongest of his honour’s servants could travel
in the annual course of the sun; that I was bred a surgeon,
whose trade it is to cure wounds and hurts in the body, gotten
by accident or violence; that my country was governed by a
female man, whom we called queen; that I left it to get riches,
whereby I might maintain myself and family, when I should
return; that, in my last voyage, I was commander of the ship,
and had about fifty Yahoos under me, many of which died
at sea, and I was forced to supply them by others picked out
from several nations; that our ship was twice in danger of being
sunk, the first time by a great storm, and the second by
striking against a rock.” Here my master interposed, by
asking me, “how I could persuade strangers, out of different
countries, to venture with me, after the losses I had sustained,
and the hazards I had run?” I said, “they were fellows of
desperate fortunes, forced to fly from the places of their birth
on account of their poverty or their crimes. Some were
undone by lawsuits; others spent all they had in drinking,
whoring, and gaming; others fled for treason; many for murder,
theft, poisoning, robbery, perjury, forgery, coining false
money, for committing rapes, or sodomy; for flying from their
colours, or deserting to the enemy; and most of them had broken
prison; none of these durst return to their native countries,
for fear of being hanged, or of starving in a jail; and
therefore they were under the necessity of seeking a livelihood
in other places.”
During this discourse, my master was pleased to interrupt me
several times. I had made use of many circumlocutions in
describing to him the nature of the several crimes for which
most of our crew had been forced to fly their country.
This labour took up several days’ conversation, before he was
able to comprehend me. He was wholly at a loss to know
what could be the use or necessity of practising those vices.
To clear up which, I endeavoured to give some ideas of the
desire of power and riches; of the terrible effects of lust,
intemperance, malice, and envy. All this I was forced to
define and describe by putting cases and making suppositions.
After which, like one whose imagination was struck with
something never seen or heard of before, he would lift up his
eyes with amazement and indignation. Power, government,
war, law, punishment, and a thousand other things, had no terms
wherein that language could express them, which made the
difficulty almost insuperable, to give my master any conception
of what I meant. But being of an excellent understanding,
much improved by contemplation and converse, he at last arrived
at a competent knowledge of what human nature, in our parts of
the world, is capable to perform, and desired I would give him
some particular account of that land which we call Europe, but
especially of my own country.
CHAPTER V.
The author at his master’s command, informs
him of the state of England. The causes of war among the princes
of Europe. The author begins to explain the English
constitution.
The reader may please to observe, that the following extract
of many conversations I had with my master, contains a summary
of the most material points which were discoursed at several
times for above two years; his honour often desiring fuller
satisfaction, as I farther improved in the Houyhnhnm
tongue. I laid before him, as well as I could, the whole
state of Europe; I discoursed of trade and manufactures, of arts
and sciences; and the answers I gave to all the questions he
made, as they arose upon several subjects, were a fund of
conversation not to be exhausted. But I shall here only
set down the substance of what passed between us concerning my
own country, reducing it in order as well as I can, without any
regard to time or other circumstances, while I strictly adhere
to truth. My only concern is, that I shall hardly be able
to do justice to my master’s arguments and expressions, which
must needs suffer by my want of capacity, as well as by a
translation into our barbarous English.
In obedience, therefore, to his honour’s commands, I related
to him the Revolution under the Prince of Orange; the long war
with France, entered into by the said prince, and renewed by his
successor, the present queen, wherein the greatest powers of
Christendom were engaged, and which still continued: I computed,
at his request, “that about a million of Yahoos might
have been killed in the whole progress of it; and perhaps a
hundred or more cities taken, and five times as many ships burnt
or sunk.”
He asked me, “what were the usual causes or motives that made
one country go to war with another?” I answered “they were
innumerable; but I should only mention a few of the chief.
Sometimes the ambition of princes, who never think they have
land or people enough to govern; sometimes the corruption of
ministers, who engage their master in a war, in order to stifle
or divert the clamour of the subjects against their evil
administration. Difference in opinions has cost many
millions of lives: for instance, whether flesh be bread, or
bread be flesh; whether the juice of a certain berry be blood or
wine; whether whistling be a vice or a virtue; whether it be
better to kiss a post, or throw it into the fire; what is the
best colour for a coat, whether black, white, red, or gray; and
whether it should be long or short, narrow or wide, dirty or
clean; with many more. Neither are any wars so furious and
bloody, or of so long a continuance, as those occasioned by
difference in opinion, especially if it be in things
indifferent.
“Sometimes the quarrel between two princes is to decide which
of them shall dispossess a third of his dominions, where neither
of them pretend to any right. Sometimes one prince
quarrels with another for fear the other should quarrel with
him. Sometimes a war is entered upon, because the enemy is
too strong; and sometimes, because he is too weak.
Sometimes our neighbours want the things which we have, or have
the things which we want, and we both fight, till they take
ours, or give us theirs. It is a very justifiable cause of
a war, to invade a country after the people have been wasted by
famine, destroyed by pestilence, or embroiled by factions among
themselves. It is justifiable to enter into war against
our nearest ally, when one of his towns lies convenient for us,
or a territory of land, that would render our dominions round
and complete. If a prince sends forces into a nation,
where the people are poor and ignorant, he may lawfully put half
of them to death, and make slaves of the rest, in order to
civilize and reduce them from their barbarous way of living.
It is a very kingly, honourable, and frequent practice, when one
prince desires the assistance of another, to secure him against
an invasion, that the assistant, when he has driven out the
invader, should seize on the dominions himself, and kill,
imprison, or banish, the prince he came to relieve.
Alliance by blood, or marriage, is a frequent cause of war
between princes; and the nearer the kindred is, the greater
their disposition to quarrel; poor nations are hungry, and rich
nations are proud; and pride and hunger will ever be at
variance. For these reasons, the trade of a soldier is
held the most honourable of all others; because a soldier is a
Yahoo
hired to kill, in cold blood, as many of his own species, who
have never offended him, as possibly he can.
“There is likewise a kind of beggarly princes in Europe, not
able to make war by themselves, who hire out their troops to
richer nations, for so much a day to each man; of which they
keep three-fourths to themselves, and it is the best part of
their maintenance: such are those in many northern parts of
Europe.”
“What you have told me,” said my master, “upon the subject of
war, does indeed discover most admirably the effects of that
reason you pretend to: however, it is happy that the shame is
greater than the danger; and that nature has left you utterly
incapable of doing much mischief. For, your mouths lying
flat with your faces, you can hardly bite each other to any
purpose, unless by consent. Then as to the claws upon your
feet before and behind, they are so short and tender, that one
of our
Yahoos would drive a dozen of yours before him. And
therefore, in recounting the numbers of those who have been
killed in battle, I cannot but think you have said the thing
which is not.”
I could not forbear shaking my head, and smiling a little at
his ignorance. And being no stranger to the art of war, I
gave him a description of cannons, culverins, muskets,
carabines, pistols, bullets, powder, swords, bayonets, battles,
sieges, retreats, attacks, undermines, countermines,
bombardments, sea fights, ships sunk with a thousand men, twenty
thousand killed on each side, dying groans, limbs flying in the
air, smoke, noise, confusion, trampling to death under horses’
feet, flight, pursuit, victory; fields strewed with carcases,
left for food to dogs and wolves and birds of prey; plundering,
stripping, ravishing, burning, and destroying. And to set
forth the valour of my own dear countrymen, I assured him, “that
I had seen them blow up a hundred enemies at once in a siege,
and as many in a ship, and beheld the dead bodies drop down in
pieces from the clouds, to the great diversion of the
spectators.”
I was going on to more particulars, when my master commanded
me silence. He said, “whoever understood the nature of
Yahoos, might easily believe it possible for so vile an
animal to be capable of every action I had named, if their
strength and cunning equalled their malice. But as my
discourse had increased his abhorrence of the whole species, so
he found it gave him a disturbance in his mind to which he was
wholly a stranger before. He thought his ears, being used
to such abominable words, might, by degrees, admit them with
less detestation: that although he hated the Yahoos of
this country, yet he no more blamed them for their odious
qualities, than he did a gnnayh (a bird of prey) for its
cruelty, or a sharp stone for cutting his hoof. But when a
creature pretending to reason could be capable of such
enormities, he dreaded lest the corruption of that faculty might
be worse than brutality itself. He seemed therefore
confident, that, instead of reason we were only possessed of
some quality fitted to increase our natural vices; as the
reflection from a troubled stream returns the image of an ill
shapen body, not only larger but more distorted.”
He added, “that he had heard too much upon the subject of
war, both in this and some former discourses. There was
another point, which a little perplexed him at present. I
had informed him, that some of our crew left their country on
account of being ruined by law; that I had already explained the
meaning of the word; but he was at a loss how it should come to
pass, that the law, which was intended for every man’s
preservation, should be any man’s ruin. Therefore he
desired to be further satisfied what I meant by law, and the
dispensers thereof, according to the present practice in my own
country; because he thought nature and reason were sufficient
guides for a reasonable animal, as we pretended to be, in
showing us what he ought to do, and what to avoid.”
I assured his honour, “that the law was a science in which I
had not much conversed, further than by employing advocates, in
vain, upon some injustices that had been done me: however, I
would give him all the satisfaction I was able.”
I said, “there was a society of men among us, bred up from
their youth in the art of proving, by words multiplied for the
purpose, that white is black, and black is white, according as
they are paid. To this society all the rest of the people
are slaves. For example, if my neighbour has a mind to my
cow, he has a lawyer to prove that he ought to have my cow from
me. I must then hire another to defend my right, it being
against all rules of law that any man should be allowed to speak
for himself. Now, in this case, I, who am the right owner,
lie under two great disadvantages: first, my lawyer, being
practised almost from his cradle in defending falsehood, is
quite out of his element when he would be an advocate for
justice, which is an unnatural office he always attempts with
great awkwardness, if not with ill-will. The second
disadvantage is, that my lawyer must proceed with great caution,
or else he will be reprimanded by the judges, and abhorred by
his brethren, as one that would lessen the practice of the law.
And therefore I have but two methods to preserve my cow.
The first is, to gain over my adversary’s lawyer with a double
fee, who will then betray his client by insinuating that he hath
justice on his side. The second way is for my lawyer to
make my cause appear as unjust as he can, by allowing the cow to
belong to my adversary: and this, if it be skilfully done, will
certainly bespeak the favour of the bench. Now your honour
is to know, that these judges are persons appointed to decide
all controversies of property, as well as for the trial of
criminals, and picked out from the most dexterous lawyers, who
are grown old or lazy; and having been biassed all their lives
against truth and equity, lie under such a fatal necessity of
favouring fraud, perjury, and oppression, that I have known some
of them refuse a large bribe from the side where justice lay,
rather than injure the faculty, by doing any thing unbecoming
their nature or their office.
“It is a maxim among these lawyers that whatever has been
done before, may legally be done again: and therefore they take
special care to record all the decisions formerly made against
common justice, and the general reason of mankind. These,
under the name of precedents, they produce as authorities to
justify the most iniquitous opinions; and the judges never fail
of directing accordingly.
“In pleading, they studiously avoid entering into the merits
of the cause; but are loud, violent, and tedious, in dwelling
upon all circumstances which are not to the purpose. For
instance, in the case already mentioned; they never desire to
know what claim or title my adversary has to my cow; but whether
the said cow were red or black; her horns long or short; whether
the field I graze her in be round or square; whether she was
milked at home or abroad; what diseases she is subject to, and
the like; after which they consult precedents, adjourn the cause
from time to time, and in ten, twenty, or thirty years, come to
an issue.
“It is likewise to be observed, that this society has a
peculiar cant and jargon of their own, that no other mortal can
understand, and wherein all their laws are written, which they
take special care to multiply; whereby they have wholly
confounded the very essence of truth and falsehood, of right and
wrong; so that it will take thirty years to decide, whether the
field left me by my ancestors for six generations belongs to me,
or to a stranger three hundred miles off.
“In the trial of persons accused for crimes against the
state, the method is much more short and commendable: the judge
first sends to sound the disposition of those in power, after
which he can easily hang or save a criminal, strictly preserving
all due forms of law.”
Here my master interposing, said, “it was a pity, that
creatures endowed with such prodigious abilities of mind, as
these lawyers, by the description I gave of them, must certainly
be, were not rather encouraged to be instructors of others in
wisdom and knowledge.” In answer to which I assured his
honour, “that in all points out of their own trade, they were
usually the most ignorant and stupid generation among us, the
most despicable in common conversation, avowed enemies to all
knowledge and learning, and equally disposed to pervert the
general reason of mankind in every other subject of discourse as
in that of their own profession.”
CHAPTER VI.
A continuation of the state of England under
Queen Anne. The character of a first minister of state in
European courts.
My master was yet wholly at a loss to understand what motives
could incite this race of lawyers to perplex, disquiet, and
weary themselves, and engage in a confederacy of injustice,
merely for the sake of injuring their fellow-animals; neither
could he comprehend what I meant in saying, they did it for
hire. Whereupon I was at much pains to describe to him the
use of money, the materials it was made of, and the value of the
metals; “that when a Yahoo had got a great store of this
precious substance, he was able to purchase whatever he had a
mind to; the finest clothing, the noblest houses, great tracts
of land, the most costly meats and drinks, and have his choice
of the most beautiful females. Therefore since money alone
was able to perform all these feats, our Yahoos thought
they could never have enough of it to spend, or to save, as they
found themselves inclined, from their natural bent either to
profusion or avarice; that the rich man enjoyed the fruit of the
poor man’s labour, and the latter were a thousand to one in
proportion to the former; that the bulk of our people were
forced to live miserably, by labouring every day for small
wages, to make a few live plentifully.”
I enlarged myself much on these, and many other particulars
to the same purpose; but his honour was still to seek; for he
went upon a supposition, that all animals had a title to their
share in the productions of the earth, and especially those who
presided over the rest. Therefore he desired I would let
him know, “what these costly meats were, and how any of us
happened to want them?” Whereupon I enumerated as many
sorts as came into my head, with the various methods of dressing
them, which could not be done without sending vessels by sea to
every part of the world, as well for liquors to drink as for
sauces and innumerable other conveniences. I assured him
“that this whole globe of earth must be at least three times
gone round before one of our better female Yahoos could
get her breakfast, or a cup to put it in.” He said “that
must needs be a miserable country which cannot furnish food for
its own inhabitants. But what he chiefly wondered at was,
how such vast tracts of ground as I described should be wholly
without fresh water, and the people put to the necessity of
sending over the sea for drink.” I replied “that England
(the dear place of my nativity) was computed to produce three
times the quantity of food more than its inhabitants are able to
consume, as well as liquors extracted from grain, or pressed out
of the fruit of certain trees, which made excellent drink, and
the same proportion in every other convenience of life.
But, in order to feed the luxury and intemperance of the males,
and the vanity of the females, we sent away the greatest part of
our necessary things to other countries, whence, in return, we
brought the materials of diseases, folly, and vice, to spend
among ourselves. Hence it follows of necessity, that vast
numbers of our people are compelled to seek their livelihood by
begging, robbing, stealing, cheating, pimping, flattering,
suborning, forswearing, forging, gaming, lying, fawning,
hectoring, voting, scribbling, star-gazing, poisoning, whoring,
canting, libelling, freethinking, and the like occupations:”
every one of which terms I was at much pains to make him
understand.
“That wine was not imported among us from foreign countries
to supply the want of water or other drinks, but because it was
a sort of liquid which made us merry by putting us out of our
senses, diverted all melancholy thoughts, begat wild extravagant
imaginations in the brain, raised our hopes and banished our
fears, suspended every office of reason for a time, and deprived
us of the use of our limbs, till we fell into a profound sleep;
although it must be confessed, that we always awaked sick and
dispirited; and that the use of this liquor filled us with
diseases which made our lives uncomfortable and short.
“But beside all this, the bulk of our people supported
themselves by furnishing the necessities or conveniences of life
to the rich and to each other. For instance, when I am at
home, and dressed as I ought to be, I carry on my body the
workmanship of a hundred tradesmen; the building and furniture
of my house employ as many more, and five times the number to
adorn my wife.”
I was going on to tell him of another sort of people, who get
their livelihood by attending the sick, having, upon some
occasions, informed his honour that many of my crew had died of
diseases. But here it was with the utmost difficulty that
I brought him to apprehend what I meant. “He could easily
conceive, that a Houyhnhnm, grew weak and heavy a few
days before his death, or by some accident might hurt a limb;
but that nature, who works all things to perfection, should
suffer any pains to breed in our bodies, he thought impossible,
and desired to know the reason of so unaccountable an evil.”
I told him “we fed on a thousand things which operated
contrary to each other; that we ate when we were not hungry, and
drank without the provocation of thirst; that we sat whole
nights drinking strong liquors, without eating a bit, which
disposed us to sloth, inflamed our bodies, and precipitated or
prevented digestion; that prostitute female Yahoos
acquired a certain malady, which bred rottenness in the bones of
those who fell into their embraces; that this, and many other
diseases, were propagated from father to son; so that great
numbers came into the world with complicated maladies upon them;
that it would be endless to give him a catalogue of all diseases
incident to human bodies, for they would not be fewer than five
or six hundred, spread over every limb and joint—in short, every
part, external and intestine, having diseases appropriated to
itself. To remedy which, there was a sort of people bred
up among us in the profession, or pretence, of curing the sick.
And because I had some skill in the faculty, I would, in
gratitude to his honour, let him know the whole mystery and
method by which they proceed.
“Their fundamental is, that all diseases arise from
repletion; whence they conclude, that a great evacuation of the
body is necessary, either through the natural passage or upwards
at the mouth. Their next business is from herbs, minerals,
gums, oils, shells, salts, juices, sea-weed, excrements, barks
of trees, serpents, toads, frogs, spiders, dead men’s flesh and
bones, birds, beasts, and fishes, to form a composition, for
smell and taste, the most abominable, nauseous, and detestable,
they can possibly contrive, which the stomach immediately
rejects with loathing, and this they call a vomit; or else, from
the same store-house, with some other poisonous additions, they
command us to take in at the orifice above or below (just as the
physician then happens to be disposed) a medicine equally
annoying and disgustful to the bowels; which, relaxing the
belly, drives down all before it; and this they call a purge, or
a clyster. For nature (as the physicians allege) having
intended the superior anterior orifice only for the intromission
of solids and liquids, and the inferior posterior for ejection,
these artists ingeniously considering that in all diseases
nature is forced out of her seat, therefore, to replace her in
it, the body must be treated in a manner directly contrary, by
interchanging the use of each orifice; forcing solids and
liquids in at the anus, and making evacuations at the mouth.
“But, besides real diseases, we are subject to many that are
only imaginary, for which the physicians have invented imaginary
cures; these have their several names, and so have the drugs
that are proper for them; and with these our female Yahoos
are always infested.
“One great excellency in this tribe, is their skill at
prognostics, wherein they seldom fail; their predictions in real
diseases, when they rise to any degree of malignity, generally
portending death, which is always in their power, when recovery
is not: and therefore, upon any unexpected signs of amendment,
after they have pronounced their sentence, rather than be
accused as false prophets, they know how to approve their
sagacity to the world, by a seasonable dose.
“They are likewise of special use to husbands and wives who
are grown weary of their mates; to eldest sons, to great
ministers of state, and often to princes.”
I had formerly, upon occasion, discoursed with my master upon
the nature of government in general, and particularly of our own
excellent constitution, deservedly the wonder and envy of the
whole world. But having here accidentally mentioned a
minister of state, he commanded me, some time after, to inform
him, “what species of Yahoo I particularly meant by that
appellation.”
I told him, “that a first or chief minister of state, who was
the person I intended to describe, was the creature wholly
exempt from joy and grief, love and hatred, pity and anger; at
least, makes use of no other passions, but a violent desire of
wealth, power, and titles; that he applies his words to all
uses, except to the indication of his mind; that he never tells
a truth but with an intent that you should take it for a lie;
nor a lie, but with a design that you should take it for a
truth; that those he speaks worst of behind their backs are in
the surest way of preferment; and whenever he begins to praise
you to others, or to yourself, you are from that day forlorn.
The worst mark you can receive is a promise, especially when it
is confirmed with an oath; after which, every wise man retires,
and gives over all hopes.
“There are three methods, by which a man may rise to be chief
minister. The first is, by knowing how, with prudence, to
dispose of a wife, a daughter, or a sister; the second, by
betraying or undermining his predecessor; and the third is, by a
furious zeal, in public assemblies, against the corruption’s of
the court. But a wise prince would rather choose to employ
those who practise the last of these methods; because such
zealots prove always the most obsequious and subservient to the
will and passions of their master. That these ministers,
having all employments at their disposal, preserve themselves in
power, by bribing the majority of a senate or great council; and
at last, by an expedient, called an act of indemnity” (whereof I
described the nature to him), “they secure themselves from
after-reckonings, and retire from the public laden with the
spoils of the nation.
“The palace of a chief minister is a seminary to breed up
others in his own trade: the pages, lackeys, and porters, by
imitating their master, become ministers of state in their
several districts, and learn to excel in the three principal
ingredients, of insolence, lying, and bribery.
Accordingly, they have a subaltern court paid to them by persons
of the best rank; and sometimes by the force of dexterity and
impudence, arrive, through several gradations, to be successors
to their lord.
“He is usually governed by a decayed wench, or favourite
footman, who are the tunnels through which all graces are
conveyed, and may properly be called, in the last resort, the
governors of the kingdom.”
One day, in discourse, my master, having heard me mention the
nobility of my country, was pleased to make me a compliment
which I could not pretend to deserve: “that he was sure I must
have been born of some noble family, because I far exceeded in
shape, colour, and cleanliness, all the Yahoos of his
nation, although I seemed to fail in strength and agility, which
must be imputed to my different way of living from those other
brutes; and besides I was not only endowed with the faculty of
speech, but likewise with some rudiments of reason, to a degree
that, with all his acquaintance, I passed for a prodigy.”
He made me observe, “that among the Houyhnhnms, the
white, the sorrel, and the iron-gray, were not so exactly shaped
as the bay, the dapple-gray, and the black; nor born with equal
talents of mind, or a capacity to improve them; and therefore
continued always in the condition of servants, without ever
aspiring to match out of their own race, which in that country
would be reckoned monstrous and unnatural.”
I made his honour my most humble acknowledgments for the good
opinion he was pleased to conceive of me, but assured him at the
same time, “that my birth was of the lower sort, having been
born of plain honest parents, who were just able to give me a
tolerable education; that nobility, among us, was altogether a
different thing from the idea he had of it; that our young
noblemen are bred from their childhood in idleness and luxury;
that, as soon as years will permit, they consume their vigour,
and contract odious diseases among lewd females; and when their
fortunes are almost ruined, they marry some woman of mean birth,
disagreeable person, and unsound constitution (merely for the
sake of money), whom they hate and despise. That the
productions of such marriages are generally scrofulous, rickety,
or deformed children; by which means the family seldom continues
above three generations, unless the wife takes care to provide a
healthy father, among her neighbours or domestics, in order to
improve and continue the breed. That a weak diseased body,
a meagre countenance, and sallow complexion, are the true marks
of noble blood; and a healthy robust appearance is so
disgraceful in a man of quality, that the world concludes his
real father to have been a groom or a coachman. The
imperfections of his mind run parallel with those of his body,
being a composition of spleen, dullness, ignorance, caprice,
sensuality, and pride.
“Without the consent of this illustrious body, no law can be
enacted, repealed, or altered: and these nobles have likewise
the decision of all our possessions, without appeal.”
Illustration by Milo Winter
CHAPTER VII.
The author’s great love of his native
country. His master’s observations upon the constitution
and administration of England, as described by the author, with
parallel cases and comparisons. His master’s observations
upon human nature.
The reader may be disposed to wonder how I could prevail on
myself to give so free a representation of my own species, among
a race of mortals who are already too apt to conceive the vilest
opinion of humankind, from that entire congruity between me and
their Yahoos. But I must freely confess, that the
many virtues of those excellent quadrupeds, placed in opposite
view to human corruptions, had so far opened my eyes and
enlarged my understanding, that I began to view the actions and
passions of man in a very different light, and to think the
honour of my own kind not worth managing; which, besides, it was
impossible for me to do, before a person of so acute a judgment
as my master, who daily convinced me of a thousand faults in
myself, whereof I had not the least perception before, and
which, with us, would never be numbered even among human
infirmities. I had likewise learned, from his example, an
utter detestation of all falsehood or disguise; and truth
appeared so amiable to me, that I determined upon sacrificing
every thing to it.
Let me deal so candidly with the reader as to confess that
there was yet a much stronger motive for the freedom I took in
my representation of things. I had not yet been a year in
this country before I contracted such a love and veneration for
the inhabitants, that I entered on a firm resolution never to
return to humankind, but to pass the rest of my life among these
admirable Houyhnhnms, in the contemplation and practice
of every virtue, where I could have no example or incitement to
vice. But it was decreed by fortune, my perpetual enemy,
that so great a felicity should not fall to my share.
However, it is now some comfort to reflect, that in what I said
of my countrymen, I extenuated their faults as much as I durst
before so strict an examiner; and upon every article gave as
favourable a turn as the matter would bear. For, indeed,
who is there alive that will not be swayed by his bias and
partiality to the place of his birth?
I have related the substance of several conversations I had
with my master during the greatest part of the time I had the
honour to be in his service; but have, indeed, for brevity sake,
omitted much more than is here set down.
When I had answered all his questions, and his curiosity
seemed to be fully satisfied, he sent for me one morning early,
and commanded me to sit down at some distance (an honour which
he had never before conferred upon me). He said, “he had
been very seriously considering my whole story, as far as it
related both to myself and my country; that he looked upon us as
a sort of animals, to whose share, by what accident he could not
conjecture, some small pittance of reason had fallen, whereof we
made no other use, than by its assistance, to aggravate our
natural corruptions, and to acquire new ones, which nature had
not given us; that we disarmed ourselves of the few abilities
she had bestowed; had been very successful in multiplying our
original wants, and seemed to spend our whole lives in vain
endeavours to supply them by our own inventions; that, as to
myself, it was manifest I had neither the strength nor agility
of a common Yahoo; that I walked infirmly on my hinder
feet; had found out a contrivance to make my claws of no use or
defence, and to remove the hair from my chin, which was intended
as a shelter from the sun and the weather: lastly, that I could
neither run with speed, nor climb trees like my brethren,” as he
called them, “the Yahoos in his country.
“That our institutions of government and law were plainly
owing to our gross defects in reason, and by consequence in
virtue; because reason alone is sufficient to govern a rational
creature; which was, therefore, a character we had no pretence
to challenge, even from the account I had given of my own
people; although he manifestly perceived, that, in order to
favour them, I had concealed many particulars, and often said
the thing which was not.
“He was the more confirmed in this opinion, because, he
observed, that as I agreed in every feature of my body with
other Yahoos, except where it was to my real disadvantage
in point of strength, speed, and activity, the shortness of my
claws, and some other particulars where nature had no part; so
from the representation I had given him of our lives, our
manners, and our actions, he found as near a resemblance in the
disposition of our minds.” He said, “the Yahoos
were known to hate one another, more than they did any different
species of animals; and the reason usually assigned was, the
odiousness of their own shapes, which all could see in the rest,
but not in themselves. He had therefore begun to think it
not unwise in us to cover our bodies, and by that invention
conceal many of our deformities from each other, which would
else be hardly supportable. But he now found he had been
mistaken, and that the dissensions of those brutes in his
country were owing to the same cause with ours, as I had
described them. For if,” said he, “you throw among five
Yahoos as much food as would be sufficient for fifty, they
will, instead of eating peaceably, fall together by the ears,
each single one impatient to have all to itself; and therefore a
servant was usually employed to stand by while they were feeding
abroad, and those kept at home were tied at a distance from each
other: that if a cow died of age or accident, before a
Houyhnhnm could secure it for his own Yahoos, those
in the neighbourhood would come in herds to seize it, and then
would ensue such a battle as I had described, with terrible
wounds made by their claws on both sides, although they seldom
were able to kill one another, for want of such convenient
instruments of death as we had invented. At other times,
the like battles have been fought between the Yahoos of
several neighbourhoods, without any visible cause; those of one
district watching all opportunities to surprise the next, before
they are prepared. But if they find their project has
miscarried, they return home, and, for want of enemies, engage
in what I call a civil war among themselves.
“That in some fields of his country there are certain shining
stones of several colours, whereof the Yahoos are
violently fond: and when part of these stones is fixed in the
earth, as it sometimes happens, they will dig with their claws
for whole days to get them out; then carry them away, and hide
them by heaps in their kennels; but still looking round with
great caution, for fear their comrades should find out their
treasure.” My master said, “he could never discover the
reason of this unnatural appetite, or how these stones could be
of any use to a Yahoo; but now he believed it might
proceed from the same principle of avarice which I had ascribed
to mankind. That he had once, by way of experiment,
privately removed a heap of these stones from the place where
one of his Yahoos
had buried it; whereupon the sordid animal, missing his
treasure, by his loud lamenting brought the whole herd to the
place, there miserably howled, then fell to biting and tearing
the rest, began to pine away, would neither eat, nor sleep, nor
work, till he ordered a servant privately to convey the stones
into the same hole, and hide them as before; which, when his
Yahoo had found, he presently recovered his spirits and good
humour, but took good care to remove them to a better hiding
place, and has ever since been a very serviceable brute.”
My master further assured me, which I also observed myself,
“that in the fields where the shining stones abound, the
fiercest and most frequent battles are fought, occasioned by
perpetual inroads of the neighbouring Yahoos.”
He said, “it was common, when two Yahoos discovered
such a stone in a field, and were contending which of them
should be the proprietor, a third would take the advantage, and
carry it away from them both;” which my master would needs
contend to have some kind of resemblance with our suits at law;
wherein I thought it for our credit not to undeceive him; since
the decision he mentioned was much more equitable than many
decrees among us; because the plaintiff and defendant there lost
nothing beside the stone they contended for: whereas our courts
of equity would never have dismissed the cause, while either of
them had any thing left.
My master, continuing his discourse, said, “there was nothing
that rendered the Yahoos more odious, than their
undistinguishing appetite to devour every thing that came in
their way, whether herbs, roots, berries, the corrupted flesh of
animals, or all mingled together: and it was peculiar in their
temper, that they were fonder of what they could get by rapine
or stealth, at a greater distance, than much better food
provided for them at home. If their prey held out, they
would eat till they were ready to burst; after which, nature had
pointed out to them a certain root that gave them a general
evacuation.
“There was also another kind of root, very juicy, but
somewhat rare and difficult to be found, which the Yahoos
sought for with much eagerness, and would suck it with great
delight; it produced in them the same effects that wine has upon
us. It would make them sometimes hug, and sometimes tear
one another; they would howl, and grin, and chatter, and reel,
and tumble, and then fall asleep in the mud.”
I did indeed observe that the Yahoos were the only
animals in this country subject to any diseases; which, however,
were much fewer than horses have among us, and contracted, not
by any ill-treatment they meet with, but by the nastiness and
greediness of that sordid brute. Neither has their
language any more than a general appellation for those maladies,
which is borrowed from the name of the beast, and called
hnea-yahoo, or Yahoo’s evil; and the cure prescribed
is a mixture of their own dung and urine, forcibly put down the
Yahoo’s
throat. This I have since often known to have been taken
with success, and do here freely recommend it to my countrymen
for the public good, as an admirable specific against all
diseases produced by repletion.
“As to learning, government, arts, manufactures, and the
like,” my master confessed, “he could find little or no
resemblance between the Yahoos of that country and those
in ours; for he only meant to observe what parity there was in
our natures. He had heard, indeed, some curious
Houyhnhnms
observe, that in most herds there was a sort of ruling Yahoo
(as among us there is generally some leading or principal stag
in a park), who was always more deformed in body, and
mischievous in disposition, than any of the rest; that this
leader had usually a favourite as like himself as he could get,
whose employment was to lick his master’s feet and posteriors,
and drive the female Yahoos to his kennel; for which he
was now and then rewarded with a piece of ass’s flesh.
This favourite is hated by the whole herd, and therefore, to
protect himself, keeps always near the person of his leader.
He usually continues in office till a worse can be found; but
the very moment he is discarded, his successor, at the head of
all the
Yahoos in that district, young and old, male and female,
come in a body, and discharge their excrements upon him from
head to foot. But how far this might be applicable to our
courts, and favourites, and ministers of state, my master said I
could best determine.”
I durst make no return to this malicious insinuation, which
debased human understanding below the sagacity of a common
hound, who has judgment enough to distinguish and follow the cry
of the ablest dog in the pack, without being ever mistaken.
My master told me, “there were some qualities remarkable in
the Yahoos, which he had not observed me to mention, or
at least very slightly, in the accounts I had given of
humankind.” He said, “those animals, like other brutes,
had their females in common; but in this they differed, that the
she
Yahoo would admit the males while she was pregnant; and
that the hes would quarrel and fight with the females, as
fiercely as with each other; both which practices were such
degrees of infamous brutality, as no other sensitive creature
ever arrived at.
“Another thing he wondered at in the Yahoos, was their
strange disposition to nastiness and dirt; whereas there appears
to be a natural love of cleanliness in all other animals.”
As to the two former accusations, I was glad to let them pass
without any reply, because I had not a word to offer upon them
in defence of my species, which otherwise I certainly had done
from my own inclinations. But I could have easily
vindicated humankind from the imputation of singularity upon the
last article, if there had been any swine in that country (as
unluckily for me there were not), which, although it may be a
sweeter quadruped than a Yahoo, cannot, I humbly
conceive, in justice, pretend to more cleanliness; and so his
honour himself must have owned, if he had seen their filthy way
of feeding, and their custom of wallowing and sleeping in the
mud.
My master likewise mentioned another quality which his
servants had discovered in several Yahoos, and to him was wholly
unaccountable. He said, “a fancy would sometimes take a
Yahoo to retire into a corner, to lie down, and howl, and
groan, and spurn away all that came near him, although he were
young and fat, wanted neither food nor water, nor did the
servant imagine what could possibly ail him. And the only
remedy they found was, to set him to hard work, after which he
would infallibly come to himself.” To this I was silent
out of partiality to my own kind; yet here I could plainly
discover the true seeds of spleen, which only seizes on the
lazy, the luxurious, and the rich; who, if they were forced to
undergo the same regimen, I would undertake for the cure.
His honour had further observed, “that a female Yahoo
would often stand behind a bank or a bush, to gaze on the young
males passing by, and then appear, and hide, using many antic
gestures and grimaces, at which time it was observed that she
had a most offensive smell; and when any of the males advanced,
would slowly retire, looking often back, and with a counterfeit
show of fear, run off into some convenient place, where she knew
the male would follow her.
“At other times, if a female stranger came among them, three
or four of her own sex would get about her, and stare, and
chatter, and grin, and smell her all over; and then turn off
with gestures, that seemed to express contempt and disdain.”
Perhaps my master might refine a little in these
speculations, which he had drawn from what he observed himself,
or had been told him by others; however, I could not reflect
without some amazement, and much sorrow, that the rudiments of
lewdness, coquetry, censure, and scandal, should have place by
instinct in womankind.
I expected every moment that my master would accuse the
Yahoos of those unnatural appetites in both sexes, so common
among us. But nature, it seems, has not been so expert a
school-mistress; and these politer pleasures are entirely the
productions of art and reason on our side of the globe.
CHAPTER VIII.
The author relates several particulars of the
Yahoos. The great virtues of the Houyhnhnms.
The education and exercise of their youth. Their general
assembly.
As I ought to have understood human nature much better than I
supposed it possible for my master to do, so it was easy to
apply the character he gave of the Yahoos to myself and
my countrymen; and I believed I could yet make further
discoveries, from my own observation. I therefore often
begged his honour to let me go among the herds of Yahoos
in the neighbourhood; to which he always very graciously
consented, being perfectly convinced that the hatred I bore
these brutes would never suffer me to be corrupted by them; and
his honour ordered one of his servants, a strong sorrel nag,
very honest and good-natured, to be my guard; without whose
protection I durst not undertake such adventures. For I
have already told the reader how much I was pestered by these
odious animals, upon my first arrival; and I afterwards failed
very narrowly, three or four times, of falling into their
clutches, when I happened to stray at any distance without my
hanger. And I have reason to believe they had some
imagination that I was of their own species, which I often
assisted myself by stripping up my sleeves, and showing my naked
arms and breasts in their sight, when my protector was with me.
At which times they would approach as near as they durst, and
imitate my actions after the manner of monkeys, but ever with
great signs of hatred; as a tame jackdaw with cap and stockings
is always persecuted by the wild ones, when he happens to be got
among them.
They are prodigiously nimble from their infancy.
However, I once caught a young male of three years old, and
endeavoured, by all marks of tenderness, to make it quiet; but
the little imp fell a squalling, and scratching, and biting with
such violence, that I was forced to let it go; and it was high
time, for a whole troop of old ones came about us at the noise,
but finding the cub was safe (for away it ran), and my sorrel
nag being by, they durst not venture near us. I observed
the young animal’s flesh to smell very rank, and the stink was
somewhat between a weasel and a fox, but much more disagreeable.
I forgot another circumstance (and perhaps I might have the
reader’s pardon if it were wholly omitted), that while I held
the odious vermin in my hands, it voided its filthy excrements
of a yellow liquid substance all over my clothes; but by good
fortune there was a small brook hard by, where I washed myself
as clean as I could; although I durst not come into my master’s
presence until I were sufficiently aired.
By what I could discover, the Yahoos appear to be the
most unteachable of all animals: their capacity never reaching
higher than to draw or carry burdens. Yet I am of opinion,
this defect arises chiefly from a perverse, restive disposition;
for they are cunning, malicious, treacherous, and revengeful.
They are strong and hardy, but of a cowardly spirit, and, by
consequence, insolent, abject, and cruel. It is observed,
that the red haired of both sexes are more libidinous and
mischievous than the rest, whom yet they much exceed in strength
and activity.
The Houyhnhnms keep the Yahoos for present use
in huts not far from the house; but the rest are sent abroad to
certain fields, where they dig up roots, eat several kinds of
herbs, and search about for carrion, or sometimes catch weasels
and luhimuhs (a sort of wild rat), which they greedily
devour. Nature has taught them to dig deep holes with
their nails on the side of a rising ground, wherein they lie by
themselves; only the kennels of the females are larger,
sufficient to hold two or three cubs.
They swim from their infancy like frogs, and are able to
continue long under water, where they often take fish, which the
females carry home to their young. And, upon this
occasion, I hope the reader will pardon my relating an odd
adventure.
Being one day abroad with my protector the sorrel nag, and
the weather exceeding hot, I entreated him to let me bathe in a
river that was near. He consented, and I immediately
stripped myself stark naked, and went down softly into the
stream. It happened that a young female Yahoo,
standing behind a bank, saw the whole proceeding, and inflamed
by desire, as the nag and I conjectured, came running with all
speed, and leaped into the water, within five yards of the place
where I bathed. I was never in my life so terribly
frightened. The nag was grazing at some distance, not
suspecting any harm. She embraced me after a most fulsome
manner. I roared as loud as I could, and the nag came
galloping towards me, whereupon she quitted her grasp, with the
utmost reluctancy, and leaped upon the opposite bank, where she
stood gazing and howling all the time I was putting on my
clothes.
This was a matter of diversion to my master and his family,
as well as of mortification to myself. For now I could no
longer deny that I was a real Yahoo in every limb and
feature, since the females had a natural propensity to me, as
one of their own species. Neither was the hair of this
brute of a red colour (which might have been some excuse for an
appetite a little irregular), but black as a sloe, and her
countenance did not make an appearance altogether so hideous as
the rest of her kind; for I think she could not be above eleven
years old.
Having lived three years in this country, the reader, I
suppose, will expect that I should, like other travellers, give
him some account of the manners and customs of its inhabitants,
which it was indeed my principal study to learn.
As these noble Houyhnhnms are endowed by nature with a
general disposition to all virtues, and have no conceptions or
ideas of what is evil in a rational creature, so their grand
maxim is, to cultivate reason, and to be wholly governed by it.
Neither is reason among them a point problematical, as with us,
where men can argue with plausibility on both sides of the
question, but strikes you with immediate conviction; as it must
needs do, where it is not mingled, obscured, or discoloured, by
passion and interest. I remember it was with extreme
difficulty that I could bring my master to understand the
meaning of the word opinion, or how a point could be disputable;
because reason taught us to affirm or deny only where we are
certain; and beyond our knowledge we cannot do either. So
that controversies, wranglings, disputes, and positiveness, in
false or dubious propositions, are evils unknown among the
Houyhnhnms. In the like manner, when I used to explain
to him our several systems of natural philosophy, he would
laugh, “that a creature pretending to reason, should value
itself upon the knowledge of other people’s conjectures, and in
things where that knowledge, if it were certain, could be of no
use.” Wherein he agreed entirely with the sentiments of
Socrates, as Plato delivers them; which I mention as the highest
honour I can do that prince of philosophers. I have often
since reflected, what destruction such doctrine would make in
the libraries of Europe; and how many paths of fame would be
then shut up in the learned world.
Friendship and benevolence are the two principal virtues
among the Houyhnhnms; and these not confined to
particular objects, but universal to the whole race; for a
stranger from the remotest part is equally treated with the
nearest neighbour, and wherever he goes, looks upon himself as
at home. They preserve decency and civility in the highest
degrees, but are altogether ignorant of ceremony. They
have no fondness for their colts or foals, but the care they
take in educating them proceeds entirely from the dictates of
reason. And I observed my master to show the same
affection to his neighbour’s issue, that he had for his own.
They will have it that nature teaches them to love the whole
species, and it is reason only that makes a distinction of
persons, where there is a superior degree of virtue.
When the matron Houyhnhnms have produced one of each
sex, they no longer accompany with their consorts, except they
lose one of their issue by some casualty, which very seldom
happens; but in such a case they meet again; or when the like
accident befalls a person whose wife is past bearing, some other
couple bestow on him one of their own colts, and then go
together again until the mother is pregnant. This caution
is necessary, to prevent the country from being overburdened
with numbers. But the race of inferior Houyhnhnms,
bred up to be servants, is not so strictly limited upon this
article: these are allowed to produce three of each sex, to be
domestics in the noble families.
In their marriages, they are exactly careful to choose such
colours as will not make any disagreeable mixture in the breed.
Strength is chiefly valued in the male, and comeliness in the
female; not upon the account of love, but to preserve the race
from degenerating; for where a female happens to excel in
strength, a consort is chosen, with regard to comeliness.
Courtship, love, presents, jointures, settlements have no
place in their thoughts, or terms whereby to express them in
their language. The young couple meet, and are joined,
merely because it is the determination of their parents and
friends; it is what they see done every day, and they look upon
it as one of the necessary actions of a reasonable being.
But the violation of marriage, or any other unchastity, was
never heard of; and the married pair pass their lives with the
same friendship and mutual benevolence, that they bear to all
others of the same species who come in their way, without
jealousy, fondness, quarrelling, or discontent.
In educating the youth of both sexes, their method is
admirable, and highly deserves our imitation. These are
not suffered to taste a grain of oats, except upon certain days,
till eighteen years old; nor milk, but very rarely; and in
summer they graze two hours in the morning, and as many in the
evening, which their parents likewise observe; but the servants
are not allowed above half that time, and a great part of their
grass is brought home, which they eat at the most convenient
hours, when they can be best spared from work.
Temperance, industry, exercise, and cleanliness, are the
lessons equally enjoined to the young ones of both sexes: and my
master thought it monstrous in us, to give the females a
different kind of education from the males, except in some
articles of domestic management; whereby, as he truly observed,
one half of our natives were good for nothing but bringing
children into the world; and to trust the care of our children
to such useless animals, he said, was yet a greater instance of
brutality.
But the Houyhnhnms train up their youth to strength,
speed, and hardiness, by exercising them in running races up and
down steep hills, and over hard stony grounds; and when they are
all in a sweat, they are ordered to leap over head and ears into
a pond or river. Four times a year the youth of a certain
district meet to show their proficiency in running and leaping,
and other feats of strength and agility; where the victor is
rewarded with a song in his or her praise. On this
festival, the servants drive a herd of Yahoos into the
field, laden with hay, and oats, and milk, for a repast to the
Houyhnhnms; after which, these brutes are immediately driven
back again, for fear of being noisome to the assembly.
Every fourth year, at the vernal equinox, there is a
representative council of the whole nation, which meets in a
plain about twenty miles from our house, and continues about
five or six days. Here they inquire into the state and
condition of the several districts; whether they abound or be
deficient in hay or oats, or cows, or Yahoos; and
wherever there is any want (which is but seldom) it is
immediately supplied by unanimous consent and contribution.
Here likewise the regulation of children is settled: as for
instance, if a Houyhnhnm has two males, he changes one of
them with another that has two females; and when a child has
been lost by any casualty, where the mother is past breeding, it
is determined what family in the district shall breed another to
supply the loss.
CHAPTER IX.
A grand debate at the general assembly of the
Houyhnhnms, and how it was determined. The learning
of the Houyhnhnms. Their buildings. Their
manner of burials. The defectiveness of their language.
One of these grand assemblies was held in my time, about
three months before my departure, whither my master went as the
representative of our district. In this council was
resumed their old debate, and indeed the only debate that ever
happened in their country; whereof my master, after his return,
give me a very particular account.
The question to be debated was, “whether the Yahoos
should be exterminated from the face of the earth?” One of
the members for the affirmative offered several arguments of
great strength and weight, alleging, “that as the Yahoos
were the most filthy, noisome, and deformed animals which nature
ever produced, so they were the most restive and indocible,
mischievous and malicious; they would privately suck the teats
of the Houyhnhnms’ cows, kill and devour their cats,
trample down their oats and grass, if they were not continually
watched, and commit a thousand other extravagancies.” He
took notice of a general tradition, “that Yahoos had not
been always in their country; but that many ages ago, two of
these brutes appeared together upon a mountain; whether produced
by the heat of the sun upon corrupted mud and slime, or from the
ooze and froth of the sea, was never known; that these Yahoos
engendered, and their brood, in a short time, grew so numerous
as to overrun and infest the whole nation; that the
Houyhnhnms, to get rid of this evil, made a general hunting,
and at last enclosed the whole herd; and destroying the elder,
every Houyhnhnm kept two young ones in a kennel, and
brought them to such a degree of tameness, as an animal, so
savage by nature, can be capable of acquiring, using them for
draught and carriage; that there seemed to be much truth in this
tradition, and that those creatures could not be yinhniamshy
(or aborigines of the land), because of the violent
hatred the Houyhnhnms, as well as all other animals, bore
them, which, although their evil disposition sufficiently
deserved, could never have arrived at so high a degree if they
had been aborigines, or else they would have long since
been rooted out; that the inhabitants, taking a fancy to use the
service of the Yahoos, had, very imprudently, neglected
to cultivate the breed of asses, which are a comely animal,
easily kept, more tame and orderly, without any offensive smell,
strong enough for labour, although they yield to the other in
agility of body, and if their braying be no agreeable sound, it
is far preferable to the horrible howlings of the Yahoos.”
Several others declared their sentiments to the same purpose,
when my master proposed an expedient to the assembly, whereof he
had indeed borrowed the hint from me. “He approved of the
tradition mentioned by the honourable member who spoke before,
and affirmed, that the two Yahoos said to be seen first
among them, had been driven thither over the sea; that coming to
land, and being forsaken by their companions, they retired to
the mountains, and degenerating by degrees, became in process of
time much more savage than those of their own species in the
country whence these two originals came. The reason of
this assertion was, that he had now in his possession a certain
wonderful Yahoo (meaning myself) which most of them had
heard of, and many of them had seen. He then related to
them how he first found me; that my body was all covered with an
artificial composure of the skins and hairs of other animals;
that I spoke in a language of my own, and had thoroughly learned
theirs; that I had related to him the accidents which brought me
thither; that when he saw me without my covering, I was an exact
Yahoo in every part, only of a whiter colour, less hairy,
and with shorter claws. He added, how I had endeavoured to
persuade him, that in my own and other countries, the Yahoos
acted as the governing, rational animal, and held the
Houyhnhnms in servitude; that he observed in me all the
qualities of a Yahoo, only a little more civilized by
some tincture of reason, which, however, was in a degree as far
inferior to the Houyhnhnm race, as the Yahoos of
their country were to me; that, among other things, I mentioned
a custom we had of castrating Houyhnhnms when they were
young, in order to render them tame; that the operation was easy
and safe; that it was no shame to learn wisdom from brutes, as
industry is taught by the ant, and building by the swallow (for
so I translate the word lyhannh, although it be a much
larger fowl); that this invention might be practised upon the
younger Yahoos here, which besides rendering them
tractable and fitter for use, would in an age put an end to the
whole species, without destroying life; that in the mean time
the Houyhnhnms should be exhorted to cultivate the breed
of asses, which, as they are in all respects more valuable
brutes, so they have this advantage, to be fit for service at
five years old, which the others are not till twelve.”
This was all my master thought fit to tell me, at that time,
of what passed in the grand council. But he was pleased to
conceal one particular, which related personally to myself,
whereof I soon felt the unhappy effect, as the reader will know
in its proper place, and whence I date all the succeeding
misfortunes of my life.
The Houyhnhnms have no letters, and consequently their
knowledge is all traditional. But there happening few
events of any moment among a people so well united, naturally
disposed to every virtue, wholly governed by reason, and cut off
from all commerce with other nations, the historical part is
easily preserved without burdening their memories. I have
already observed that they are subject to no diseases, and
therefore can have no need of physicians. However, they
have excellent medicines, composed of herbs, to cure accidental
bruises and cuts in the pastern or frog of the foot, by sharp
stones, as well as other maims and hurts in the several parts of
the body.
They calculate the year by the revolution of the sun and
moon, but use no subdivisions into weeks. They are well
enough acquainted with the motions of those two luminaries, and
understand the nature of eclipses; and this is the utmost
progress of their astronomy.
In poetry, they must be allowed to excel all other mortals;
wherein the justness of their similes, and the minuteness as
well as exactness of their descriptions, are indeed inimitable.
Their verses abound very much in both of these, and usually
contain either some exalted notions of friendship and
benevolence or the praises of those who were victors in races
and other bodily exercises. Their buildings, although very
rude and simple, are not inconvenient, but well contrived to
defend them from all injuries of cold and heat. They have
a kind of tree, which at forty years old loosens in the root,
and falls with the first storm: it grows very straight, and
being pointed like stakes with a sharp stone (for the
Houyhnhnms know not the use of iron), they stick them erect
in the ground, about ten inches asunder, and then weave in oat
straw, or sometimes wattles, between them. The roof is
made after the same manner, and so are the doors.
The Houyhnhnms use the hollow part, between the
pastern and the hoof of their fore-foot, as we do our hands, and
this with greater dexterity than I could at first imagine.
I have seen a white mare of our family thread a needle (which I
lent her on purpose) with that joint. They milk their
cows, reap their oats, and do all the work which requires hands,
in the same manner. They have a kind of hard flints,
which, by grinding against other stones, they form into
instruments, that serve instead of wedges, axes, and hammers.
With tools made of these flints, they likewise cut their hay,
and reap their oats, which there grow naturally in several
fields; the Yahoos
draw home the sheaves in carriages, and the servants tread them
in certain covered huts to get out the grain, which is kept in
stores. They make a rude kind of earthen and wooden
vessels, and bake the former in the sun.
If they can avoid casualties, they die only of old age, and
are buried in the obscurest places that can be found, their
friends and relations expressing neither joy nor grief at their
departure; nor does the dying person discover the least regret
that he is leaving the world, any more than if he were upon
returning home from a visit to one of his neighbours. I
remember my master having once made an appointment with a friend
and his family to come to his house, upon some affair of
importance: on the day fixed, the mistress and her two children
came very late; she made two excuses, first for her husband,
who, as she said, happened that very morning to shnuwnh.
The word is strongly expressive in their language, but not
easily rendered into English; it signifies, “to retire to his
first mother.” Her excuse for not coming sooner, was, that
her husband dying late in the morning, she was a good while
consulting her servants about a convenient place where his body
should be laid; and I observed, she behaved herself at our house
as cheerfully as the rest. She died about three months
after.
They live generally to seventy, or seventy-five years, very
seldom to fourscore. Some weeks before their death, they
feel a gradual decay; but without pain. During this time
they are much visited by their friends, because they cannot go
abroad with their usual ease and satisfaction. However,
about ten days before their death, which they seldom fail in
computing, they return the visits that have been made them by
those who are nearest in the neighbourhood, being carried in a
convenient sledge drawn by Yahoos; which vehicle they
use, not only upon this occasion, but when they grow old, upon
long journeys, or when they are lamed by any accident: and
therefore when the dying Houyhnhnms return those visits,
they take a solemn leave of their friends, as if they were going
to some remote part of the country, where they designed to pass
the rest of their lives.
I know not whether it may be worth observing, that the
Houyhnhnms have no word in their language to express any
thing that is evil, except what they borrow from the deformities
or ill qualities of the Yahoos. Thus they denote
the folly of a servant, an omission of a child, a stone that
cuts their feet, a continuance of foul or unseasonable weather,
and the like, by adding to each the epithet of Yahoo.
For instance, hhnm Yahoo; whnaholm Yahoo,
ynlhmndwihlma Yahoo, and an ill-contrived house
ynholmhnmrohlnw Yahoo.
I could, with great pleasure, enlarge further upon the
manners and virtues of this excellent people; but intending in a
short time to publish a volume by itself, expressly upon that
subject, I refer the reader thither; and, in the mean time,
proceed to relate my own sad catastrophe.
CHAPTER X.
The author’s economy, and happy life, among
the Houyhnhnms. His great improvement in virtue by
conversing with them. Their conversations. The
author has notice given him by his master, that he must depart
from the country. He falls into a swoon for grief; but
submits. He contrives and finishes a canoe by the help of
a fellow-servant, and puts to sea at a venture.
I had settled my little economy to my own heart’s content.
My master had ordered a room to be made for me, after their
manner, about six yards from the house: the sides and floors of
which I plastered with clay, and covered with rush-mats of my
own contriving. I had beaten hemp, which there grows wild,
and made of it a sort of ticking; this I filled with the
feathers of several birds I had taken with springes made of
Yahoos’
hairs, and were excellent food. I had worked two chairs
with my knife, the sorrel nag helping me in the grosser and more
laborious part. When my clothes were worn to rags, I made
myself others with the skins of rabbits, and of a certain
beautiful animal, about the same size, called nnuhnoh,
the skin of which is covered with a fine down. Of these I
also made very tolerable stockings. I soled my shoes with
wood, which I cut from a tree, and fitted to the upper-leather;
and when this was worn out, I supplied it with the skins of
Yahoos dried in the sun. I often got honey out of
hollow trees, which I mingled with water, or ate with my bread.
No man could more verify the truth of these two maxims, “That
nature is very easily satisfied;” and, “That necessity is the
mother of invention.” I enjoyed perfect health of body,
and tranquillity of mind; I did not feel the treachery or
inconstancy of a friend, nor the injuries of a secret or open
enemy. I had no occasion of bribing, flattering, or
pimping, to procure the favour of any great man, or of his
minion; I wanted no fence against fraud or oppression: here was
neither physician to destroy my body, nor lawyer to ruin my
fortune; no informer to watch my words and actions, or forge
accusations against me for hire: here were no gibers, censurers,
backbiters, pickpockets, highwaymen, housebreakers, attorneys,
bawds, buffoons, gamesters, politicians, wits, splenetics,
tedious talkers, controvertists, ravishers, murderers, robbers,
virtuosos; no leaders, or followers, of party and faction; no
encouragers to vice, by seducement or examples; no dungeon,
axes, gibbets, whipping-posts, or pillories; no cheating
shopkeepers or mechanics; no pride, vanity, or affectation; no
fops, bullies, drunkards, strolling whores, or poxes; no
ranting, lewd, expensive wives; no stupid, proud pedants; no
importunate, overbearing, quarrelsome, noisy, roaring, empty,
conceited, swearing companions; no scoundrels raised from the
dust upon the merit of their vices, or nobility thrown into it
on account of their virtues; no lords, fiddlers, judges, or
dancing-masters.
I had the favour of being admitted to several Houyhnhnms,
who came to visit or dine with my master; where his honour
graciously suffered me to wait in the room, and listen to their
discourse. Both he and his company would often descend to
ask me questions, and receive my answers. I had also
sometimes the honour of attending my master in his visits to
others. I never presumed to speak, except in answer to a
question; and then I did it with inward regret, because it was a
loss of so much time for improving myself; but I was infinitely
delighted with the station of an humble auditor in such
conversations, where nothing passed but what was useful,
expressed in the fewest and most significant words; where, as I
have already said, the greatest decency was observed, without
the least degree of ceremony; where no person spoke without
being pleased himself, and pleasing his companions; where there
was no interruption, tediousness, heat, or difference of
sentiments. They have a notion, that when people are met
together, a short silence does much improve conversation: this I
found to be true; for during those little intermissions of talk,
new ideas would arise in their minds, which very much enlivened
the discourse. Their subjects are, generally on friendship
and benevolence, on order and economy; sometimes upon the
visible operations of nature, or ancient traditions; upon the
bounds and limits of virtue; upon the unerring rules of reason,
or upon some determinations to be taken at the next great
assembly: and often upon the various excellences of poetry.
I may add, without vanity, that my presence often gave them
sufficient matter for discourse, because it afforded my master
an occasion of letting his friends into the history of me and my
country, upon which they were all pleased to descant, in a
manner not very advantageous to humankind: and for that reason I
shall not repeat what they said; only I may be allowed to
observe, that his honour, to my great admiration, appeared to
understand the nature of Yahoos
much better than myself. He went through all our vices and
follies, and discovered many, which I had never mentioned to
him, by only supposing what qualities a Yahoo of their
country, with a small proportion of reason, might be capable of
exerting; and concluded, with too much probability, “how vile,
as well as miserable, such a creature must be.”
I freely confess, that all the little knowledge I have of any
value, was acquired by the lectures I received from my master,
and from hearing the discourses of him and his friends; to which
I should be prouder to listen, than to dictate to the greatest
and wisest assembly in Europe. I admired the strength,
comeliness, and speed of the inhabitants; and such a
constellation of virtues, in such amiable persons, produced in
me the highest veneration. At first, indeed, I did not
feel that natural awe, which the Yahoos and all other
animals bear toward them; but it grew upon me by decrees, much
sooner than I imagined, and was mingled with a respectful love
and gratitude, that they would condescend to distinguish me from
the rest of my species.
When I thought of my family, my friends, my countrymen, or
the human race in general, I considered them, as they really
were, Yahoos in shape and disposition, perhaps a little
more civilized, and qualified with the gift of speech; but
making no other use of reason, than to improve and multiply
those vices whereof their brethren in this country had only the
share that nature allotted them. When I happened to behold
the reflection of my own form in a lake or fountain, I turned
away my face in horror and detestation of myself, and could
better endure the sight of a common Yahoo than of my own
person. By conversing with the Houyhnhnms, and
looking upon them with delight, I fell to imitate their gait and
gesture, which is now grown into a habit; and my friends often
tell me, in a blunt way, “that I trot like a horse;” which,
however, I take for a great compliment. Neither shall I
disown, that in speaking I am apt to fall into the voice and
manner of the Houyhnhnms, and hear myself ridiculed on
that account, without the least mortification.
In the midst of all this happiness, and when I looked upon
myself to be fully settled for life, my master sent for me one
morning a little earlier than his usual hour. I observed
by his countenance that he was in some perplexity, and at a loss
how to begin what he had to speak. After a short silence,
he told me, “he did not know how I would take what he was going
to say: that in the last general assembly, when the affair of
the Yahoos
was entered upon, the representatives had taken offence at his
keeping a Yahoo (meaning myself) in his family, more like
a Houyhnhnm than a brute animal; that he was known
frequently to converse with me, as if he could receive some
advantage or pleasure in my company; that such a practice was
not agreeable to reason or nature, or a thing ever heard of
before among them; the assembly did therefore exhort him either
to employ me like the rest of my species, or command me to swim
back to the place whence I came: that the first of these
expedients was utterly rejected by all the Houyhnhnms who
had ever seen me at his house or their own; for they alleged,
that because I had some rudiments of reason, added to the
natural pravity of those animals, it was to be feared I might be
able to seduce them into the woody and mountainous parts of the
country, and bring them in troops by night to destroy the
Houyhnhnms’ cattle, as being naturally of the ravenous kind,
and averse from labour.”
My master added, “that he was daily pressed by the
Houyhnhnms of the neighbourhood to have the assembly’s
exhortation executed, which he could not put off much longer.
He doubted it would be impossible for me to swim to another
country; and therefore wished I would contrive some sort of
vehicle, resembling those I had described to him, that might
carry me on the sea; in which work I should have the assistance
of his own servants, as well as those of his neighbours.”
He concluded, “that for his own part, he could have been content
to keep me in his service as long as I lived; because he found I
had cured myself of some bad habits and dispositions, by
endeavouring, as far as my inferior nature was capable, to
imitate the Houyhnhnms.”
I should here observe to the reader, that a decree of the
general assembly in this country is expressed by the word
hnhloayn, which signifies an exhortation, as near as I can
render it; for they have no conception how a rational creature
can be compelled, but only advised, or exhorted; because no
person can disobey reason, without giving up his claim to be a
rational creature.
I was struck with the utmost grief and despair at my master’s
discourse; and being unable to support the agonies I was under,
I fell into a swoon at his feet. When I came to myself, he
told me “that he concluded I had been dead;” for these people
are subject to no such imbecilities of nature. I answered
in a faint voice, “that death would have been too great a
happiness; that although I could not blame the assembly’s
exhortation, or the urgency of his friends; yet, in my weak and
corrupt judgment, I thought it might consist with reason to have
been less rigorous; that I could not swim a league, and probably
the nearest land to theirs might be distant above a hundred:
that many materials, necessary for making a small vessel to
carry me off, were wholly wanting in this country; which,
however, I would attempt, in obedience and gratitude to his
honour, although I concluded the thing to be impossible, and
therefore looked on myself as already devoted to destruction;
that the certain prospect of an unnatural death was the least of
my evils; for, supposing I should escape with life by some
strange adventure, how could I think with temper of passing my
days among Yahoos, and relapsing into my old corruptions,
for want of examples to lead and keep me within the paths of
virtue? that I knew too well upon what solid reasons all the
determinations of the wise Houyhnhnms were founded, not
to be shaken by arguments of mine, a miserable Yahoo; and
therefore, after presenting him with my humble thanks for the
offer of his servants’ assistance in making a vessel, and
desiring a reasonable time for so difficult a work, I told him I
would endeavour to preserve a wretched being; and if ever I
returned to England, was not without hopes of being useful to my
own species, by celebrating the praises of the renowned
Houyhnhnms, and proposing their virtues to the imitation of
mankind.”
My master, in a few words, made me a very gracious reply;
allowed me the space of two months to finish my boat; and
ordered the sorrel nag, my fellow-servant (for so, at this
distance, I may presume to call him), to follow my instruction;
because I told my master, “that his help would be sufficient,
and I knew he had a tenderness for me.”
In his company, my first business was to go to that part of
the coast where my rebellious crew had ordered me to be set on
shore. I got upon a height, and looking on every side into
the sea; fancied I saw a small island toward the north-east.
I took out my pocket glass, and could then clearly distinguish
it above five leagues off, as I computed; but it appeared to the
sorrel nag to be only a blue cloud: for as he had no conception
of any country beside his own, so he could not be as expert in
distinguishing remote objects at sea, as we who so much converse
in that element.
After I had discovered this island, I considered no further;
but resolved it should if possible, be the first place of my
banishment, leaving the consequence to fortune.
I returned home, and consulting with the sorrel nag, we went
into a copse at some distance, where I with my knife, and he
with a sharp flint, fastened very artificially after their
manner, to a wooden handle, cut down several oak wattles, about
the thickness of a walking-staff, and some larger pieces.
But I shall not trouble the reader with a particular description
of my own mechanics; let it suffice to say, that in six weeks
time with the help of the sorrel nag, who performed the parts
that required most labour, I finished a sort of Indian canoe,
but much larger, covering it with the skins of Yahoos,
well stitched together with hempen threads of my own making.
My sail was likewise composed of the skins of the same animal;
but I made use of the youngest I could get, the older being too
tough and thick; and I likewise provided myself with four
paddles. I laid in a stock of boiled flesh, of rabbits and
fowls, and took with me two vessels, one filled with milk and
the other with water.
I tried my canoe in a large pond, near my master’s house, and
then corrected in it what was amiss; stopping all the chinks
with Yahoos’ tallow, till I found it staunch, and able to
bear me and my freight; and, when it was as complete as I could
possibly make it, I had it drawn on a carriage very gently by
Yahoos to the sea-side, under the conduct of the sorrel nag
and another servant.
When all was ready, and the day came for my departure, I took
leave of my master and lady and the whole family, my eyes
flowing with tears, and my heart quite sunk with grief.
But his honour, out of curiosity, and, perhaps, (if I may speak
without vanity,) partly out of kindness, was determined to see
me in my canoe, and got several of his neighbouring friends to
accompany him. I was forced to wait above an hour for the
tide; and then observing the wind very fortunately bearing
toward the island to which I intended to steer my course, I took
a second leave of my master: but as I was going to prostrate
myself to kiss his hoof, he did me the honour to raise it gently
to my mouth. I am not ignorant how much I have been
censured for mentioning this last particular. Detractors
are pleased to think it improbable, that so illustrious a person
should descend to give so great a mark of distinction to a
creature so inferior as I. Neither have I forgotten how
apt some travellers are to boast of extraordinary favours they
have received. But, if these censurers were better
acquainted with the noble and courteous disposition of the
Houyhnhnms, they would soon change their opinion.
I paid my respects to the rest of the Houyhnhnms in
his honour’s company; then getting into my canoe, I pushed off
from shore.
CHAPTER XI.
The author’s dangerous voyage. He
arrives at New Holland, hoping to settle there. Is wounded
with an arrow by one of the natives. Is seized and carried
by force into a Portuguese ship. The great civilities of
the captain. The author arrives at England.
I began this desperate voyage on February 15, 1714–15, at
nine o’clock in the morning. The wind was very favourable;
however, I made use at first only of my paddles; but considering
I should soon be weary, and that the wind might chop about, I
ventured to set up my little sail; and thus, with the help of
the tide, I went at the rate of a league and a half an hour, as
near as I could guess. My master and his friends continued
on the shore till I was almost out of sight; and I often heard
the sorrel nag (who always loved me) crying out, “Hnuy illa
nyha,
majah Yahoo;” “Take care of thyself, gentle Yahoo.”
My design was, if possible, to discover some small island
uninhabited, yet sufficient, by my labour, to furnish me with
the necessaries of life, which I would have thought a greater
happiness, than to be first minister in the politest court of
Europe; so horrible was the idea I conceived of returning to
live in the society, and under the government of Yahoos.
For in such a solitude as I desired, I could at least enjoy my
own thoughts, and reflect with delight on the virtues of those
inimitable Houyhnhnms, without an opportunity of
degenerating into the vices and corruptions of my own species.
The reader may remember what I related, when my crew
conspired against me, and confined me to my cabin; how I
continued there several weeks without knowing what course we
took; and when I was put ashore in the long-boat, how the
sailors told me, with oaths, whether true or false, “that they
knew not in what part of the world we were.” However, I
did then believe us to be about 10 degrees southward of the Cape
of Good Hope, or about 45 degrees southern latitude, as I
gathered from some general words I overheard among them, being I
supposed to the south-east in their intended voyage to
Madagascar. And although this were little better than
conjecture, yet I resolved to steer my course eastward, hoping
to reach the south-west coast of New Holland, and perhaps some
such island as I desired lying westward of it. The wind
was full west, and by six in the evening I computed I had gone
eastward at least eighteen leagues; when I spied a very small
island about half a league off, which I soon reached. It
was nothing but a rock, with one creek naturally arched by the
force of tempests. Here I put in my canoe, and climbing a
part of the rock, I could plainly discover land to the east,
extending from south to north. I lay all night in my
canoe; and repeating my voyage early in the morning, I arrived
in seven hours to the south-east point of New Holland.
This confirmed me in the opinion I have long entertained, that
the maps and charts place this country at least three degrees
more to the east than it really is; which thought I communicated
many years ago to my worthy friend, Mr. Herman Moll, and gave
him my reasons for it, although he has rather chosen to follow
other authors.
I saw no inhabitants in the place where I landed, and being
unarmed, I was afraid of venturing far into the country. I
found some shellfish on the shore, and ate them raw, not daring
to kindle a fire, for fear of being discovered by the natives.
I continued three days feeding on oysters and limpets, to save
my own provisions; and I fortunately found a brook of excellent
water, which gave me great relief.
On the fourth day, venturing out early a little too far, I
saw twenty or thirty natives upon a height not above five
hundred yards from me. They were stark naked, men, women,
and children, round a fire, as I could discover by the smoke.
One of them spied me, and gave notice to the rest; five of them
advanced toward me, leaving the women and children at the fire.
I made what haste I could to the shore, and, getting into my
canoe, shoved off: the savages, observing me retreat, ran after
me: and before I could get far enough into the sea, discharged
an arrow which wounded me deeply on the inside of my left knee:
I shall carry the mark to my grave. I apprehended the
arrow might be poisoned, and paddling out of the reach of their
darts (being a calm day), I made a shift to suck the wound, and
dress it as well as I could.
I was at a loss what to do, for I durst not return to the
same landing-place, but stood to the north, and was forced to
paddle, for the wind, though very gentle, was against me,
blowing north-west. As I was looking about for a secure
landing-place, I saw a sail to the north-north-east, which
appearing every minute more visible, I was in some doubt whether
I should wait for them or not; but at last my detestation of the
Yahoo race prevailed: and turning my canoe, I sailed and
paddled together to the south, and got into the same creek
whence I set out in the morning, choosing rather to trust myself
among these barbarians, than live with European Yahoos.
I drew up my canoe as close as I could to the shore, and hid
myself behind a stone by the little brook, which, as I have
already said, was excellent water.
The ship came within half a league of this creek, and sent
her long boat with vessels to take in fresh water (for the
place, it seems, was very well known); but I did not observe it,
till the boat was almost on shore; and it was too late to seek
another hiding-place. The seamen at their landing observed
my canoe, and rummaging it all over, easily conjectured that the
owner could not be far off. Four of them, well armed,
searched every cranny and lurking-hole, till at last they found
me flat on my face behind the stone. They gazed awhile in
admiration at my strange uncouth dress; my coat made of skins,
my wooden-soled shoes, and my furred stockings; whence, however,
they concluded, I was not a native of the place, who all go
naked. One of the seamen, in Portuguese, bid me rise, and
asked who I was. I understood that language very well, and
getting upon my feet, said, “I was a poor Yahoo banished
from the Houyhnhnms, and desired they would please to let
me depart.” They admired to hear me answer them in their
own tongue, and saw by my complexion I must be a European; but
were at a loss to know what I meant by Yahoos and
Houyhnhnms; and at the same time fell a-laughing at my
strange tone in speaking, which resembled the neighing of a
horse. I trembled all the while betwixt fear and hatred.
I again desired leave to depart, and was gently moving to my
canoe; but they laid hold of me, desiring to know, “what country
I was of? whence I came?” with many other questions. I
told them “I was born in England, whence I came about five years
ago, and then their country and ours were at peace. I
therefore hoped they would not treat me as an enemy, since I
meant them no harm, but was a poor Yahoo
seeking some desolate place where to pass the remainder of his
unfortunate life.”
When they began to talk, I thought I never heard or saw any
thing more unnatural; for it appeared to me as monstrous as if a
dog or a cow should speak in England, or a Yahoo in
Houyhnhnmland. The honest Portuguese were equally
amazed at my strange dress, and the odd manner of delivering my
words, which, however, they understood very well. They
spoke to me with great humanity, and said, “they were sure the
captain would carry me gratis to Lisbon, whence I might
return to my own country; that two of the seamen would go back
to the ship, inform the captain of what they had seen, and
receive his orders; in the mean time, unless I would give my
solemn oath not to fly, they would secure me by force. I
thought it best to comply with their proposal. They were
very curious to know my story, but I gave them very little
satisfaction, and they all conjectured that my misfortunes had
impaired my reason. In two hours the boat, which went
laden with vessels of water, returned, with the captain’s
command to fetch me on board. I fell on my knees to
preserve my liberty; but all was in vain; and the men, having
tied me with cords, heaved me into the boat, whence I was taken
into the ship, and thence into the captain’s cabin.
His name was Pedro de Mendez; he was a very courteous and
generous person. He entreated me to give some account of
myself, and desired to know what I would eat or drink; said, “I
should be used as well as himself;” and spoke so many obliging
things, that I wondered to find such civilities from a Yahoo.
However, I remained silent and sullen; I was ready to faint at
the very smell of him and his men. At last I desired
something to eat out of my own canoe; but he ordered me a
chicken, and some excellent wine, and then directed that I
should be put to bed in a very clean cabin. I would not
undress myself, but lay on the bed-clothes, and in half an hour
stole out, when I thought the crew was at dinner, and getting to
the side of the ship, was going to leap into the sea, and swim
for my life, rather than continue among Yahoos. But
one of the seamen prevented me, and having informed the captain,
I was chained to my cabin.
After dinner, Don Pedro came to me, and desired to know my
reason for so desperate an attempt; assured me, “he only meant
to do me all the service he was able;” and spoke so very
movingly, that at last I descended to treat him like an animal
which had some little portion of reason. I gave him a very
short relation of my voyage; of the conspiracy against me by my
own men; of the country where they set me on shore, and of my
five years residence there. All which he looked upon as if
it were a dream or a vision; whereat I took great offence; for I
had quite forgot the faculty of lying, so peculiar to Yahoos,
in all countries where they preside, and, consequently, their
disposition of suspecting truth in others of their own species.
I asked him, “whether it were the custom in his country to say
the thing which was not?” I assured him, “I had almost
forgot what he meant by falsehood, and if I had lived a thousand
years in Houyhnhnmland, I should never have heard a lie
from the meanest servant; that I was altogether indifferent
whether he believed me or not; but, however, in return for his
favours, I would give so much allowance to the corruption of his
nature, as to answer any objection he would please to make, and
then he might easily discover the truth.”
The captain, a wise man, after many endeavours to catch me
tripping in some part of my story, at last began to have a
better opinion of my veracity. But he added, “that since I
professed so inviolable an attachment to truth, I must give him
my word and honour to bear him company in this voyage, without
attempting any thing against my life; or else he would continue
me a prisoner till we arrived at Lisbon.” I gave him the
promise he required; but at the same time protested, “that I
would suffer the greatest hardships, rather than return to live
among Yahoos.”
Our voyage passed without any considerable accident. In
gratitude to the captain, I sometimes sat with him, at his
earnest request, and strove to conceal my antipathy against
human kind, although it often broke out; which he suffered to
pass without observation. But the greatest part of the day
I confined myself to my cabin, to avoid seeing any of the crew.
The captain had often entreated me to strip myself of my savage
dress, and offered to lend me the best suit of clothes he had.
This I would not be prevailed on to accept, abhorring to cover
myself with any thing that had been on the back of a Yahoo.
I only desired he would lend me two clean shirts, which, having
been washed since he wore them, I believed would not so much
defile me. These I changed every second day, and washed
them myself.
We arrived at Lisbon, Nov. 5, 1715. At our landing, the
captain forced me to cover myself with his cloak, to prevent the
rabble from crowding about me. I was conveyed to his own
house; and at my earnest request he led me up to the highest
room backwards. I conjured him “to conceal from all
persons what I had told him of the Houyhnhnms; because
the least hint of such a story would not only draw numbers of
people to see me, but probably put me in danger of being
imprisoned, or burnt by the Inquisition.” The captain
persuaded me to accept a suit of clothes newly made; but I would
not suffer the tailor to take my measure; however, Don Pedro
being almost of my size, they fitted me well enough. He
accoutred me with other necessaries, all new, which I aired for
twenty-four hours before I would use them.
The captain had no wife, nor above three servants, none of
which were suffered to attend at meals; and his whole deportment
was so obliging, added to very good human understanding, that I
really began to tolerate his company. He gained so far
upon me, that I ventured to look out of the back window.
By degrees I was brought into another room, whence I peeped into
the street, but drew my head back in a fright. In a week’s
time he seduced me down to the door. I found my terror
gradually lessened, but my hatred and contempt seemed to
increase. I was at last bold enough to walk the street in
his company, but kept my nose well stopped with rue, or
sometimes with tobacco.
In ten days, Don Pedro, to whom I had given some account of
my domestic affairs, put it upon me, as a matter of honour and
conscience, “that I ought to return to my native country, and
live at home with my wife and children.” He told me,
“there was an English ship in the port just ready to sail, and
he would furnish me with all things necessary.” It would
be tedious to repeat his arguments, and my contradictions.
He said, “it was altogether impossible to find such a solitary
island as I desired to live in; but I might command in my own
house, and pass my time in a manner as recluse as I pleased.”
I complied at last, finding I could not do better. I
left Lisbon the 24th day of November, in an English merchantman,
but who was the master I never inquired. Don Pedro
accompanied me to the ship, and lent me twenty pounds. He
took kind leave of me, and embraced me at parting, which I bore
as well as I could. During this last voyage I had no
commerce with the master or any of his men; but, pretending I
was sick, kept close in my cabin. On the fifth of
December, 1715, we cast anchor in the Downs, about nine in the
morning, and at three in the afternoon I got safe to my house at
Rotherhith.
[546]
My wife and family received me with great surprise and joy,
because they concluded me certainly dead; but I must freely
confess the sight of them filled me only with hatred, disgust,
and contempt; and the more, by reflecting on the near alliance I
had to them. For although, since my unfortunate exile from
the
Houyhnhnm country, I had compelled myself to tolerate the
sight of Yahoos, and to converse with Don Pedro de
Mendez, yet my memory and imagination were perpetually filled
with the virtues and ideas of those exalted Houyhnhnms.
And when I began to consider that, by copulating with one of the
Yahoo species I had become a parent of more, it struck me
with the utmost shame, confusion, and horror.
As soon as I entered the house, my wife took me in her arms,
and kissed me; at which, having not been used to the touch of
that odious animal for so many years, I fell into a swoon for
almost an hour. At the time I am writing, it is five years
since my last return to England. During the first year, I
could not endure my wife or children in my presence; the very
smell of them was intolerable; much less could I suffer them to
eat in the same room. To this hour they dare not presume
to touch my bread, or drink out of the same cup, neither was I
ever able to let one of them take me by the hand. The
first money I laid out was to buy two young stone-horses, which
I keep in a good stable; and next to them, the groom is my
greatest favourite, for I feel my spirits revived by the smell
he contracts in the stable. My horses understand me
tolerably well; I converse with them at least four hours every
day. They are strangers to bridle or saddle; they live in
great amity with me and friendship to each other.
CHAPTER XII.
The author’s veracity. His design in
publishing this work. His censure of those travellers who
swerve from the truth. The author clears himself from any
sinister ends in writing. An objection answered. The
method of planting colonies. His native country commended.
The right of the crown to those countries described by the
author is justified. The difficulty of conquering them.
The author takes his last leave of the reader; proposes his
manner of living for the future; gives good advice, and
concludes.
Thus, gentle reader, I have given thee a faithful history of
my travels for sixteen years and above seven months: wherein I
have not been so studious of ornament as of truth. I
could, perhaps, like others, have astonished thee with strange
improbable tales; but I rather chose to relate plain matter of
fact, in the simplest manner and style; because my principal
design was to inform, and not to amuse thee.
It is easy for us who travel into remote countries, which are
seldom visited by Englishmen or other Europeans, to form
descriptions of wonderful animals both at sea and land.
Whereas a traveller’s chief aim should be to make men wiser and
better, and to improve their minds by the bad, as well as good,
example of what they deliver concerning foreign places.
I could heartily wish a law was enacted, that every
traveller, before he were permitted to publish his voyages,
should be obliged to make oath before the Lord High Chancellor,
that all he intended to print was absolutely true to the best of
his knowledge; for then the world would no longer be deceived,
as it usually is, while some writers, to make their works pass
the better upon the public, impose the grossest falsities on the
unwary reader. I have perused several books of travels
with great delight in my younger days; but having since gone
over most parts of the globe, and been able to contradict many
fabulous accounts from my own observation, it has given me a
great disgust against this part of reading, and some indignation
to see the credulity of mankind so impudently abused.
Therefore, since my acquaintance were pleased to think my poor
endeavours might not be unacceptable to my country, I imposed on
myself, as a maxim never to be swerved from, that I would
strictly adhere to truth; neither indeed can I be ever under the
least temptation to vary from it, while I retain in my mind the
lectures and example of my noble master and the other
illustrious Houyhnhnms of whom I had so long the honour
to be an humble hearer.
—Nec si miserum Fortuna Sinonem
Finxit, vanum etiam, mendacemque improba
finget.
I know very well, how little reputation is to be got by
writings which require neither genius nor learning, nor indeed
any other talent, except a good memory, or an exact journal.
I know likewise, that writers of travels, like
dictionary-makers, are sunk into oblivion by the weight and bulk
of those who come last, and therefore lie uppermost. And
it is highly probable, that such travellers, who shall hereafter
visit the countries described in this work of mine, may, by
detecting my errors (if there be any), and adding many new
discoveries of their own, justle me out of vogue, and stand in
my place, making the world forget that ever I was an author.
This indeed would be too great a mortification, if I wrote for
fame: but as my sole intention was the public good, I cannot be
altogether disappointed. For who can read of the virtues I
have mentioned in the glorious Houyhnhnms, without being
ashamed of his own vices, when he considers himself as the
reasoning, governing animal of his country? I shall say
nothing of those remote nations where Yahoos preside;
among which the least corrupted are the Brobdingnagians;
whose wise maxims in morality and government it would be our
happiness to observe. But I forbear descanting further,
and rather leave the judicious reader to his own remarks and
application.
I am not a little pleased that this work of mine can possibly
meet with no censurers: for what objections can be made against
a writer, who relates only plain facts, that happened in such
distant countries, where we have not the least interest, with
respect either to trade or negotiations? I have carefully
avoided every fault with which common writers of travels are
often too justly charged. Besides, I meddle not the least
with any party, but write without passion, prejudice, or
ill-will against any man, or number of men, whatsoever. I
write for the noblest end, to inform and instruct mankind; over
whom I may, without breach of modesty, pretend to some
superiority, from the advantages I received by conversing so
long among the most accomplished Houyhnhnms. I
write without any view to profit or praise. I never suffer
a word to pass that may look like reflection, or possibly give
the least offence, even to those who are most ready to take it.
So that I hope I may with justice pronounce myself an author
perfectly blameless; against whom the tribes of Answerers,
Considerers, Observers, Reflectors, Detectors, Remarkers, will
never be able to find matter for exercising their talents.
I confess, it was whispered to me, “that I was bound in duty,
as a subject of England, to have given in a memorial to a
secretary of state at my first coming over; because, whatever
lands are discovered by a subject belong to the crown.”
But I doubt whether our conquests in the countries I treat of
would be as easy as those of Ferdinando Cortez over the naked
Americans. The Lilliputians, I think, are hardly
worth the charge of a fleet and army to reduce them; and I
question whether it might be prudent or safe to attempt the
Brobdingnagians; or whether an English army would be much at
their ease with the Flying Island over their heads. The
Houyhnhnms indeed appear not to be so well prepared for war,
a science to which they are perfect strangers, and especially
against missive weapons. However, supposing myself to be a
minister of state, I could never give my advice for invading
them. Their prudence, unanimity, unacquaintedness with
fear, and their love of their country, would amply supply all
defects in the military art. Imagine twenty thousand of
them breaking into the midst of an European army, confounding
the ranks, overturning the carriages, battering the warriors’
faces into mummy by terrible yerks from their hinder hoofs; for
they would well deserve the character given to Augustus,
Recalcitrat undique tutus. But, instead of proposals
for conquering that magnanimous nation, I rather wish they were
in a capacity, or disposition, to send a sufficient number of
their inhabitants for civilizing Europe, by teaching us the
first principles of honour, justice, truth, temperance, public
spirit, fortitude, chastity, friendship, benevolence, and
fidelity. The names of all which virtues are still
retained among us in most languages, and are to be met with in
modern, as well as ancient authors; which I am able to assert
from my own small reading.
But I had another reason, which made me less forward to
enlarge his majesty’s dominions by my discoveries. To say
the truth, I had conceived a few scruples with relation to the
distributive justice of princes upon those occasions. For
instance, a crew of pirates are driven by a storm they know not
whither; at length a boy discovers land from the topmast; they
go on shore to rob and plunder, they see a harmless people, are
entertained with kindness; they give the country a new name;
they take formal possession of it for their king; they set up a
rotten plank, or a stone, for a memorial; they murder two or
three dozen of the natives, bring away a couple more, by force,
for a sample; return home, and get their pardon. Here
commences a new dominion acquired with a title by divine right.
Ships are sent with the first opportunity; the natives driven
out or destroyed; their princes tortured to discover their gold;
a free license given to all acts of inhumanity and lust, the
earth reeking with the blood of its inhabitants: and this
execrable crew of butchers, employed in so pious an expedition,
is a modern colony, sent to convert and civilize an idolatrous
and barbarous people!
But this description, I confess, does by no means affect the
British nation, who may be an example to the whole world for
their wisdom, care, and justice in planting colonies; their
liberal endowments for the advancement of religion and learning;
their choice of devout and able pastors to propagate
Christianity; their caution in stocking their provinces with
people of sober lives and conversations from this the mother
kingdom; their strict regard to the distribution of justice, in
supplying the civil administration through all their colonies
with officers of the greatest abilities, utter strangers to
corruption; and, to crown all, by sending the most vigilant and
virtuous governors, who have no other views than the happiness
of the people over whom they preside, and the honour of the king
their master.
But as those countries which I have described do not appear
to have any desire of being conquered and enslaved, murdered or
driven out by colonies, nor abound either in gold, silver,
sugar, or tobacco, I did humbly conceive, they were by no means
proper objects of our zeal, our valour, or our interest.
However, if those whom it more concerns think fit to be of
another opinion, I am ready to depose, when I shall be lawfully
called, that no European did ever visit those countries before
me. I mean, if the inhabitants ought to be believed,
unless a dispute may arise concerning the two Yahoos,
said to have been seen many years ago upon a mountain in
Houyhnhnmland.
But, as to the formality of taking possession in my
sovereign’s name, it never came once into my thoughts; and if it
had, yet, as my affairs then stood, I should perhaps, in point
of prudence and self-preservation, have put it off to a better
opportunity.
Having thus answered the only objection that can ever be
raised against me as a traveller, I here take a final leave of
all my courteous readers, and return to enjoy my own
speculations in my little garden at Redriff; to apply those
excellent lessons of virtue which I learned among the
Houyhnhnms; to instruct the Yahoos of my own family,
is far as I shall find them docible animals; to behold my figure
often in a glass, and thus, if possible, habituate myself by
time to tolerate the sight of a human creature; to lament the
brutality to Houyhnhnms in my own country, but always
treat their persons with respect, for the sake of my noble
master, his family, his friends, and the whole Houyhnhnm
race, whom these of ours have the honour to resemble in all
their lineaments, however their intellectuals came to
degenerate.
I began last week to permit my wife to sit at dinner with me,
at the farthest end of a long table; and to answer (but with the
utmost brevity) the few questions I asked her. Yet, the
smell of a Yahoo continuing very offensive, I always keep
my nose well stopped with rue, lavender, or tobacco leaves.
And, although it be hard for a man late in life to remove old
habits, I am not altogether out of hopes, in some time, to
suffer a neighbour Yahoo in my company, without the
apprehensions I am yet under of his teeth or his claws.
My reconcilement to the Yahoo kind in general might
not be so difficult, if they would be content with those vices
and follies only which nature has entitled them to. I am
not in the least provoked at the sight of a lawyer, a
pickpocket, a colonel, a fool, a lord, a gamester, a politician,
a whoremonger, a physician, an evidence, a suborner, an
attorney, a traitor, or the like; this is all according to the
due course of things: but when I behold a lump of deformity and
diseases, both in body and mind, smitten with pride, it
immediately breaks all the measures of my patience; neither
shall I be ever able to comprehend how such an animal, and such
a vice, could tally together. The wise and virtuous
Houyhnhnms, who abound in all excellences that can adorn a
rational creature, have no name for this vice in their language,
which has no terms to express any thing that is evil, except
those whereby they describe the detestable qualities of their
Yahoos, among which they were not able to distinguish this
of pride, for want of thoroughly understanding human nature, as
it shows itself in other countries where that animal presides.
But I, who had more experience, could plainly observe some
rudiments of it among the wild Yahoos.
But the Houyhnhnms, who live under the government of
reason, are no more proud of the good qualities they possess,
than I should be for not wanting a leg or an arm; which no man
in his wits would boast of, although he must be miserable
without them. I dwell the longer upon this subject from
the desire I have to make the society of an English Yahoo
by any means not insupportable; and therefore I here entreat
those who have any tincture of this absurd vice, that they will
not presume to come in my sight.
